Lemondrop

You know when you're sad, and you're not even full from the supreme Tombstone you crammed in your face because you were just trying to fill the void? Turns out, bad sex really IS like bad pizza -- why you have it is directly linked to how satisfied it leaves you.

It seems that people who were doing it for love or commitment felt more sexually satisfied than those who were just trying to boost their self-esteem or get something else that they wanted. (Although the researcher who conducted the study at the University of Texas at Austin didn't quantify "satisfaction," so we're not sure if we're talking orgasms or just an overall sense of well-being here.)

The study found that women had more reasons for having sex than men did in general, possibly because they are the "gatekeeper" to sex, as one researcher put it (one who apparently has a funny idea of how vaginas work).

Women who had sex to express gratitude or to apologize also felt pretty satisfied, more so than people who were looking for a new and exciting experience. You heard it here: Sex with somebody you don't hate trumps a one-night stand with somebody you wouldn't want to have awkward brunch with. Thanks, science, for the hard-hitting facts.