The best thing about Halloween used to be the pillowcase full of candy. But if you don't have a kid to borrow, trick-or-treating at a certain age can be ... embarrassing.

On the plus side, it's an excuse to eat candy in drink form, mixed with alcohol (and we don't have to worry about anybody hiding razorblades in it). Enjoy these drinks while you watch "Hocus Pocus" and imagine sucking the youth out of passing trick-or-treaters.

The Dead Lebowski
This morbid cocktail is basically a White Russian with a cookie rim. Yes, that's right. We said "cookie rim." Deal with it.

2 parts vodka
1 part Kahlua
A generous splash of half & half
Oreo cookies

To garnish: 1 Barbie leg, toes painted green.

Crush three to four Oreo sandwich cookies into a small dish or saucer, and fill another with a splash of Kahlua. Dip the rim of a rocks glass in the Kahlua saucer, and then into the dish of cookie crumbs to coat. Add ice and fill with vodka, Kahlua and cream. Stir to combine with leg.

Witch's T*t
Because martini glasses have always reminded you of inverted breasts.


One part Midori liqueur
Two parts vodka

Combine in a cocktail shaker with ice. Pour into a martini glass and garnish with plastic spider rings (and maraschino cherries or gumdrops, if you're feeling hypoglycemic).

All Eyez on Me
Fun fact: Lychees are the eyeball of the fruit family.


Canned lychee, juice reserved
Fresh blueberries
Two ounces vodka
Lemon juice

Drain the lychee, reserve liquid. Pat the fruit dry with a paper towel. Stuff the fruit with a blueberry to create an "eyeball." Mix the vodka, lychee liquid and a dash of lemon juice in a martini shaker with ice and pour into a chilled glass full of edible "eyes."

The Hull Cleaner
Don't like sweet drinks? Try this basic dirty martini inspired by our favorite "Heathers" murder.

Two ounces London-style dry gin
Dry vermouth
Olive juice
Blue food coloring

Put just a whisper of vermouth in a mug and gently swirl. Combine gin, food coloring, and ice in a cocktail shaker and pour into mug. Serve gently, with a chainsaw. Beware of coffee tables.