Lemondrop

We love daily-deal start-up Groupon, because who doesn't love discounts on stuff you definitely don't need? Also, sometimes they run really great specials at Mexican restaurants.

So, even though we hate Internet dating, we were intrigued when we heard that they were creating their own online matching service. What, we wondered, would the concept be? You and a stranger have an awkward chat while you both receive $27 blowouts (a $55 value)?

Well, brace yourself, lonely bargain lovers. The site (which really missed by calling itself Grouspawn instead of Grope-on) is predicated on the idea that couples meeting on the site and using a Groupon may ultimately lead to the creation of a baby.

And, drum roll, please: Couples who first meet on Groupspawn, have sex and ultimately conceive will be invited to apply for a college scholarship for their discount baby. Up to two sets of parents who meet on Groupspawn can win the scholarship annually.

"Every day, Groupon helps create tens of thousands of life experiences that wouldn't have otherwise occurred. Inevitably, a percentage of those experiences lead to the creation of baby humans," said Andrew Mason, the CEO of Groupon, in a press release. "We want to make sure Groupon Babies are the smartest babies in the world."

He goes on to suggest snapping a photo of yourself and your date holding a Groupon when you first meet.

Ha ha ha, yeah, we know, when a guy brings a coupon on a first date, it DOES make us want to have unprotected sex with him. And really -- isn't that why we Internet date? To find a guy who wants to knock us up as badly as we want to BE knocked up? Fellas! We are fertile and we have a voucher for 65 percent off go-kart racing.

Clearly the site is tongue in cheek and includes an important disclaimer warning you not to have children for money. No, seriously, you shouldn't. No matter how badly you want discount tuition, it's just wrong.