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Quick, look around you! You're surrounded ... by hopeless romantics. Despite all the advice to just suck it up and marry somebody we can kinda tolerate, it turns out that the majority of us believe we have a soul mate -- somebody we're destined to spend our lives with -- and somehow we will find that one person among the billions of humans walking the earth.
Awwwwwwww.
According to a poll of 1,004 Americans, two-thirds believe in soul mates. The study reported other statistics about love and marriage in America, such as the fact that people who believe in soul mates and apply that notion to their marriages are 150 percent more likely to get divorced. BUUURN! People with more traditional views, who see marriage as a lifelong commitment involving fidelity and being part of a community, seemed to have the highest rate of satisfaction.
People age 18–29 had the highest occurrence of "soul mate" ideology; 73 percent of 'em believe he (or she) is out there. Only 62 percent of those over the age of 60 buy the concept, even though 96 percent of them said they felt they'd married the "right" person. So, maybe soul mates aren't so important after all.
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Wednesday 08 September
By Virginia
I'm 18. I don't believe in soulmates. I think (This is just me!) you can really love the person you're with and FEEL like you can't live without them. You can't imagine being with someone else. However, in the end, you can find someone else who makes you just as happy, if not more happy. Maybe not in the same ways but equally great, if you're willing to move on from the previous relationship.
However, I should probably mention that my parents are divorced and I'm an atheist.
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Wednesday 08 September
By Virginia
Also, people change. Maybe you were great together at 20, but at 50 you're completely different people. Hopefully you grew together, but that's not always the case.
Thursday 09 September
By Angie
I found mine. It's a weird feeling to be connected to a person from the first moment on. And it's far different than falling in love and being comfortable with the other person. I've had that in my past. I'm not going to be naive and say that there is only one person out in the world that we are compatible or "right" for. The sheer mathematics behind it shows otherwise. I just believe that ultimately there is one person in the world that is your true soulmate. Some people don't get lucky enough to find them. I served a bowl of soup to mine in a restaurant.
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Tuesday 12 October
By seri
That is awesome. Mine drove 170 miles to meet me and fix my plumbing. In ten minutes I knew. I took his hand as we drove to the hardware store and that was just it. We have everything in common. I always find the things I don't like about someone and pick them apart. Him, he isn't worried about punctuality, he does dishes slow as all get out, and he procrastinates. The first two we are opposites, the last we match up too. We laugh it off. We both believe in reincarnation so sometimes we feel de ja vous and it is so strong that we are swayed physically. But I'm glad you found yours. It is a blessing.
Saturday 18 September
By stitched
Erm, what does "soul mates" have anything to do with your "religious" choice? Nothing.
Anyways!
I believe in love, so ofc, I believe in "soul mates," there is someone out there for everyone. To me, if you don't find your soul mate, the fault, is on your own. We are given choices, paths, etcetc every day, and each one of them pin point where we are going. Looking back, if all the events did not happen in my life as they did, I would had never found my lover, plain and simple. My choices led me to my love, just like how it will for everyone else. It's about taking life, and actually living it. You cannot possibly find love if you just sit in a room all day, doing nothing. Love doesn't fall right on your lap - doesn't work that way, which is something most people do not understand.
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Saturday 18 September
By Taylor
Heck yes I do believe in soul mates! I've been dating mine for the past two years and we are absolutely crazy inlove with each other! He and I see each other as so much more than just boyfriend/girlfriend. He is also my absolute best friend and I, his. I thank God for him every day!
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Friday 08 October
By fireball101586
YES I believe in a soul mate. I married mine at 16 and he was 18, come next Friday we will be married 24 yrs! He isn't just my husband and lover, he is my BEST friend. If something, God forbids ever happens to him, I will never marry again, because there is no other man out there like him, not to me.
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Wednesday 13 October
By Seri McGee
I felt that someone was out there who was just right for me. I hadn't thought of soul mate until later. I have been married 4 times, divorced 4 times. I wanted everything. love, compassion, consideration, affection and the other habits I didn't like not to be there.
At 44 I finally found him. Odd as it seems I'd been having a recurring dream since I was about 6 years old. The man I met has a picture of himself at about 12 and that is exactly how I saw him in the dream for about 35 years. He is exactly what I wanted. All the little and big things I wanted or didn't want in my love he possesses.
Is he what would be considered my soul mate? I don't know but he is perfect for me. That I do believe. But who wants to wait for half their life? I guess I tried to settle but in the end I actually got what I needed and wanted.
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Monday 01 November
By Don Canard
WTF, over ?
"suck it up and marry someone we can kind of tolerate" ??
Seriously ?
Who has friends like that, they sound like a bunch of Republicans.
Why would I possibly _marry_ someone I can kind of tolerate ?
Get a housemate, maybe. Marry ?
Is the premise that the married state is somehow a requirement ?
Is the premise that our society and culture are such trash that there's an expectation of everyone demanding that you prove that you can hook up and are wedding material no matter how wide a net you have to cast ?
Is there some premise that sex is a requirement and that marriage is the only setting in which our prudish idiot fellows can conceive of it happening ?
I got news for ya: I can "kind of tolerate" my gal Mary palm and her five friends. Let's face it, everyone jacks/jills off, and with the diversity of battery-powered vibrating far Eastern novelties available these days, no one needs to sit home alone bored with nothing but time on their hands.
I can more than tolerate a whole lot of workers in the sex industry who aren't coerced into doing the job (no pun intended) and who want no more than a smile and $50 (well, depending on what you all get up to).
Or is it companionship and the premise that we can't function if we don't share our private life with someone ? Why would I possibly do that with someone I can "kind of tolerate", aside from economic reasons and the aforementioned housemate ?
Is our culture truly so worthless that we are little men who need snatch, housekeeping and culinary skills and will "put up with" someone who can provide those ? And little women who haven't figured out that they get only one daddy and instead want to find "Mr. Right" who meets the requirements in The Rules and makes them feel just like they did when they were a little girl.
I realize that people like that exist and that in fact the whole western monogamous fidelity business is premised on it, but I wouldn't give folks like that the time of day, and I assure the readership that there's a whole bunch of others out there who aren't as pathetic. You'd think that the Sixties had never happened, we were all wearing burkahs when not attending church services, and that "hookups" are for municipal utilities. Geez.
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