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Bienvenidos A Miami
Just like Will Smith predicted, the taut, tanned people of Miami are having way more sex than you. (Asylum)

Booking it
Having spent all their money on stereotype-centric television, New Jersey is closing the few remaining public libraries in Camden, the country's most dangerous city. (Salon)

Girl, You'll Be A Woman Soon
According to a recent study, girls are entering puberty younger than ever, much to the chagrin of parents, and the delight of "SVU" producers. (NYT)

Love Is All That I Can Give To You
YouAndMeArePure.com, for that special someone you can't try before you buy. (Gizmodo)






(Images: AP)

Cheeky Monkey
The Kardashians are designing a line of home furnishings. This is how their brainstorming conversation went. (Shelterpop)

A Shore Thing
The cast of "Jersey Shore" will make an appearance at the Teen Choice Awards, having been nominated for the coveted "Best Motivation To Go To College" prize. (The Superficial)

Gaga Ooh La La
Lady Gaga is said to be starring in a feature film said to be, "part acid trip, part runway show, all hermaphrodite porn." (Digital Spy)

Tough Sell
A Craigslister in the market to unload his car has accidentally unloaded a lot more -- including a sideways picture of his junk. (Geekologie)

Dancing Machine
Scientists have created the first robot capable of human emotions and dancing, citing Julianne Hough as "a fluke". (Gawker)