Lemondrop

Jeans feeling a little tight lately? Blame your job -- specifically, your "office feeder," what the Daily Mail dubs those who derive pleasure from trying to fatten up their colleagues.

Not sure if you have an office feeder or who she is? Just follow the smell of fresh-baked goods to the woman in accounting who's always making breakfast muffins. And afternoon snack brownies. And TGIF cupcakes. The telltale sign? Her desk is suspiciously clean of carby crumbs, yet she's always hovering around you, asking if you've tried her treat of the day yet (sounds like Grandma).

Sticking to a healthy diet at the office is hard enough without doing daily battle against feeders. Professor Brian Wansink, the author of "Mindless Eating: Why We Eat More Than We Think," found that female secretaries ate 5.6 times more chocolates if they were placed on a nearby desk than if they had to stand up and walk to get it, and that women are more likely to be influenced by the diet patterns of co-workers than men.

The Daily Mail goes on to share harrowing survivor tales, from the failed Weight Watcher dieter who feels bullied by her office feeder, to Claire Hill, who's apparently suffering from Stockholm Syndrome, saying "There are times when I think she really is out to get me fat. But then I wonder if she's just someone that likes to care for people, loves food and always has a full fridge at home. It does cross my mind that maybe she just likes me."

Geez. Good thing we work in women's publishing, where you're not allowed to eat and office birthdays are celebrated not with cake but with a group circuit training session.

Susan Ringwood, chief executive of the eating disorders charity Beat, says that it's about control: diet sabotage reinforces a feeder's sense of mastery, especially when they're not indulging themselves. Oh, good. Now not only do you have to worry about your office rival in meetings, but you have to watch out for her in the kitchen, too.

We'll admit, we're tempted to laugh at sinister-sounding statements like "'My office feeder is very clever and knows all my weaknesses," but we can't help but empathize. Sticking to a diet is hard enough when it's just you sabotaging your own efforts-having an office Top Chef pushing forbidden goodies on you makes it nearly impossible.

The Daily Mail has all sorts of tips for fighting back against your resident chocolate chip cookie dealer, advising you to stash the goods out of sight in a drawer and keeping healthy snacks like celery stalks on your desk to encourage you to eat well, but we have a better idea: Master your ability to cry on command, and next time you spot the office feeder marching towards your desk with sugar cookies in hand, wave her away in tears, explaining that you once had a traumatic experience with Girl Scouts.