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Last season we were optimistic, but this time around, the return of "Project Runway" has us rolling our eyes and sighing, "Again?" This is in part because the episodes are extending to 90 minutes -- is making it longer really going to improve matters? -- but also because it feels like we've already seen it all.

By now we're pretty clear on what it looks like when people are forced to make clothes from candy wrappers; that sewing in general is hard; and that the Bluefly wall is to be used wisely. We'd rather Lifetime (or anyone!) shook things up by turning its attention to some other professions about which we still harbor some curiosity.

Here are our suggestions for where to go when the "Runway" is empty.

1) Paint-Color Namers
We have never in our lives painted a room blue. It's always "Polar Fantasy" or "Impromptu Danube." Yellow isn't yellow; it's "Confident Lemon." And we once saw a pink paint chip called "Ice Plant," which made about as much sense as, well, Impromptu Danube.

Who are the maestros of nomenclature who stare into a swatch of yellow-tinged white and think, I know -- "June Vision"! How do they kill time at work when a shade of violet isn't inspiring their inner wordsmiths? Is there an open bar at that holiday party? Do they ever get bitter and name a color after a failed office romance, like, say, "Jilted Scarlett" or "Dead Asshat"? We must know. The spin-off can involve the people who name cashmere colors for J.Crew.

2) Gym-Equipment Designer
"What if we made a ladder, see? But not just any ladder -- a mechanized ladder that goes in a loop, up and up, endlessly, and you never reach the top. You're just climbing until all your limbs fall off and Jillian on "The Biggest Loser" tells you that you're not trying because your mother put pudding in your lunchbox when you were twelve. It will be MAGICAL." That sadist must have some nutty friends, right? Or at least great abs. Sometimes that's all you need.
3) Math Word-Problem Author
You might think the dude who sits at his desk trying to decide if Train A was going west at 78 miles per hour, and whether Train B passed it on the way to Milan, is a dry guy. But we suspect Mr. How Many Apples Does Steve Have Left? owns a ripe inner life. Seriously, the man knows the fastest way to Milan. You know he gets ladies. And just imagine a team-building challenge where all the Math Geniuses in the Word-Problem Building are forced to write 10 problems in 20 minutes without using the phrase "per hour." Pocket protectors will roll!

4) Lifeguards


Hot, tanned people running around saving the lives of other hot, tanned people. Need we say more? How about, it worked for "Baywatch"?
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5) Horoscope Writer
Occasionally, those little nuggets of wisdom in the daily seem to have all the answers. Sometimes, however, they tell you that you're about to purchase a condo, despite the fact that you just spent your last dollar on ramen -- at which point you gripe to yourself, "Now they're just making stuff up."

We'd love to know if that's true. Because, come on: There's got to be a day when the Sage in Residence shows up hung over after dollar-margarita night at Chili's, only to find he or she is just not feeling this forecasting-the-future thing and so flips a coin to decide who gets "You are unstoppable today" and who's stuck with "Don't even go outside. It's just going to get worse." If he/she is a Leo, does he/she ever give Leos the good love horoscopes in the hope of getting the number of that hottie from the supermarket? We foresee a hit.