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Possible Freedom From Those Nacho-Shortage Dreams
So, science might be able to cure recurring nightmares with a technique called "scripting." Ha ha, why would we need that where there's THIS? (NYT)

The Best Offense
A new study suggests that while acting "defensive" is good for men, it may not necessarily be for women. What the f**k is that supposed to mean?!??? (MSNBC)

Failure to Launch
63 percent of women report experiencing sexual problems -- mainly inability to climax. This is what happens when you cancel "Party Down," Showtime. (Eurekalert)

Foo La La La to the Chief
So, Wyclef is considering running for president of Haiti. Yes! We like this! Pop stars for president! Change every national anthem to "The Stripper Song!" (Thegrio)

Biological Crock
Are you outgoing? Slightly neurotic? Easy to get along with? Well, double-bag it, you're probably extra-fertile. (Guardian)

(Images: AP, Getty)


Drag Me to Heaven
Discussing her sometimes BF Justin Long's nude scene in an upcoming film, Drew Barrymore channeled her inner frat boy: "I was like, 'That's right, bitch. The tables are turned!'" (People)

Somebody to Love
Twitter's Crown Prince, Shaquille O'Neal, has given "Shaq Fu" fans a reason to live: the return of his singing career, starting with a sweet serenade to Justin Bieber. (BuzzFeed)

Reversal of Fortune
Uncomfortable being left out of the spotlight reserved for despicable anti-Semites, Oliver Stone gets in on the career-ruining Jew-bashing action. (The Superficial)

Taking the "Joy" Out of "Joystick"
A new abstinence-based video game is giving teenage gamers a means of keeping their countless potential sex partners at bay. Finally! (The Awl)

Dumpster Diva
Move over, Emily Post! Wendy Williams used her eponymous "TV show" to extol the joys of eating out of the trash. (Gawker)