Do you need a reason to stay awake all night? Like, maybe you're babysitting late, pulling an all-nighter at the University of Phoenix, or you're trying to head off jetlag by staying up until you're on Tokyo time?

Well, it's your lucky day. Meet Alex McRae, the creepiest creeper ever to skulk the creep circuit. Alex is a humanoid gastropod who's allegedly teaching men "How to Pick Up a Girl in a Bar," but the video should really be called "Flavor Savers and This Shirt: A Seminar in How Never to Get Laid." Perhaps the most terrifying moment probably comes at 1:33, when Alex suggests you hit on a girl by asking her if you can eat her eyes. Not joking! To quote Alex, "It's just strange!"

Check out Scary Alex and pray for the any-number-of-women who could be chained to radiators in his basement as we speak. Then head on over to our cousin site Urlesque and check out their collection of rib-tickling response videos. We're sorry in advance for the nightmares. Enjoy!

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If "Law & Order" investigated my sex life(Lemondrop)
Could you stop shopping for five months? Here's how she did. (Lemondrop)
I had an office affair ... with another girl.