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spring breakSome people have parents who are the epitome of controlling: uptight, tense, and they never let their guard down. You know the types. Parents who work hard and never play -- hard or otherwise. I do not have one of those parents.

Those types of parents would never let their kid make margaritas with them on family taco night. Those types of parents would never smoke cigars with you on the back porch. And Those types of parents certainly would never take my sister and I to an all-inclusive resort in Cancun for spring break and tell us to "drink up while you can."

Those types of parents would never do that. But my mom sure did.

And that, I realized mid–tequila shot, is why I love her. All it took was a little trip to Cancun for me to discover ... the five places on an all-Inclusive adventure that can instantly up your mom's cool factor:

1. Check-In
In most families, and at most hotels, this might be a fairly humdrum experience. But when the hotel provides free mimosas upon check-in, they are inviting my family to fight. Because I'd be damned if my mom was going to have the first drink of spring break and not include me. So there, at the front desk, a tussle ensued over the single complimentary mimosa the hotel offered the both of us. Even though I emerged victorious, I admired my mom's pluck. If my dad had come on the trip, a fight between us would definitely not have had the same outcome. But a mimosa is a mimosa, and I wasn't going to let that slide.

2. The Hotel Club
This is where my younger sister got kicked out not once, but three times, for being underage. And yet my mom not only continually bought her illicit wristbands to get her in, she even fought with the bouncers on her behalf. This resulted in my sister's illegal admittance to the club more than once and allowed for family bonding time in the conga line, where tequila was poured down my sister's and my throats as we sashayed by. But it also led to a problematic face-off in the ...

3. Hotel Security Office
It was in this darkened, closed-door room that my mom finally met her match in the form of the hotel security manager. Her game was up despite her continued bald-faced lying about my sister's age and our family's involvement with the illegal wristband ring run by the hotel bellhops. My sister lost her 18-and-up wristband and her ability to engage in the never-ending supply of Miami Vices and Long Island Iced Teas and "Boom Boom" shots. What finally made my mom crack? Security had to threaten to kick us out of the hotel and contact the local authorities. I mean, my mom's a badass, but even she wasn't down for Mexican prison.

4. A bar ... any bar really ... so long as it's all-inclusive
Despite my sister's wristband handicap, she was still able to drink throughout the rest of the trip thanks to the supply of Dirty Shirley's and Strawberry Daiquiris that my mom and I provided. That is, until Luis the bartender saw me slip a drink to my sister and proceeded to threaten me, and even worse, refuse to serve me for the rest of the trip. So my mom stepped up her illicit drink-stealing game, and began to go drink for drink with my sister. This continued until she began yelling the same question eight times repeatedly across the bar. Then I decided it was time to go home. She still loudly maintained her sobriety though, even as she veered off the sidewalk. Thank God I have experience with many drunk sorority girls or else I would not have known how to handle that situation.

5. A cab ride
It got even better the nights my mom, my sister and I didn't have a collective stumble home from the hotel bar or disco, but instead ventured into downtown Cancun for a more formal night out. By formal I mean we wore sundresses with our flip flops instead of jean shorts. To the bars of Cancun, I say, "Gracias," for getting my mother drunk enough to begin buying me drinks. It saved me a lot of money and got the both of us drunk enough to do family shot rounds and run out of the bar still holding all of our glasses. But lastly, I would like to thank you, Cancun, for providing us with the nicest cab driver ever. Thanks to Raul we somehow managed to all get a half-hour cab ride back to our hotel... free of charge. We just walked out of the cab and into our rooms. Successful night? I think so.

So all in all, I saw my mom drunk, saw my mom commit international illegal activity, and watched my mom almost get arrested. And while I saw my little sister do basically all those same things, that's not quite as out of the ordinary. But my mom did it all, while creating very little embarrassment. She was actually pretty cool. Definitely not one of "those parents," and for that I am glad. Thanks Cancun, for a week I'll never forget, and one my mom will never remember!

Have a spring break story that pushes the boundaries? Think this mom ought to be locked up? Do tell!