Breakups. In the moment, there are few things in life that feel more soul-shattering than getting thrown under the bus by the person you care most about most.
In last week's GuySpeak/GirlSpeak
, we asked: How do you deal with the heartache of losing the person who is your best friend, lover and big spoon all rolled up in one?
Here's what Lemondrop readers had to say about moving on from your ex.
1. Go cold turkey.
says, "If you break up with someone that you have been with for awhile (at least several months), your body goes through an actual withdrawal phase. This is accompanied by a change in neurotransmitters in your brain and feels horrible. The best way to get over this is to stop your ex cold turkey -- don't look at pictures, don't listen to voicemail messages, don't keep around articles that have their scent or cologne. That will just set you back into painful territory."
"I also agree with the cold turkey method," says Lindsay
. I delete all emails and pictures, trash notes, cards or gifts I can live without, throw meaningful jewelry in a river, etc."
2. Live the single life.
advises us to get used to independence so that we can start fresh when the next guy sweeps us off our feet. After a six-year hiatus between boyfriends, she says, "I got so used to being alone that now that I am in a new relationship, its like starting over as a young'n."3. However, spend quality time with friends and family -- not time in bed with strangers from the bar.
"Rebound hook ups aren't helpful for anyone," says Nicole
. "After the deed is done you just feel worse about yourself. Break ups suck but you will eventually get over it. Spend time with your friends or family, that will make you feel better than hooking up with some random person you barely know. Just because someone isn't in your life anymore doesn't mean that you deserve to be unhappy."
4. Give yourself emotional strength by building physical strength.
"I recommend weight lifting or anything that makes you feel literally strong -- you have to be strong to get through the breaking up process." -- Mariehelene
5. Let time do its thing.
The expression is a cliché for a reason. As Shelly says, "It is good to take a period of time to get him or her out of your system. Time is the only thing that will heal a broken heart."
Tell us! Do you have a tried-and-true method of getting over your ex?
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