Terri Carlson has been proposed to well over 1,000 times this week. The 45-year-old divorced mother from California has taken her search for a husband worldwide via YouTube, and while she says she is looking for love, there's something she's looking for even more: health insurance.
"I don't care what you look like. But what I do care about is how good your health insurance is. So, you want me to respond to you? Attach your health-care benefit information," she practically purrs into the Web cam.
Below the video, a line of comments continues to grow: "I sent you a message an hour ago on a different video, but let me add, with military insurance, as long as we use a military doctor, it's free and it's for life. I offer this to you. Contact me!"
"I am not a drinker, and I don't smoke or ever hit a woman. I don't argue, I am 55, decent-looking and financially responsible," says one potential husband.
Another reply simply states, "Give Canada a shot."
The attention is flattering, but Carlson also knows that the flirting could save her life.
Tired of waiting for health-care reform that she no longer believes is coming, last week she launched Will Marry for Health Insurance, a Web site on which she lays herself, and her problems, out for all the world to see. Ever since, the media has flocked.
But is she a savvy victim, a poster woman for the uninsured masses? Or maybe even a reality TV star in the making? After the jump, Lemondrop's exclusive interview with the embattled mom.
First, what exactly is ailing her? Carlson has a rare genetic disorder called C4 Complement Deficiency -- an autoimmune disease that prevents her body from being able to fight off infection. "I'll get over a virus, but I have all of these antibodies that won't clear out of my body," she told Lemondrop. "My body thinks there is still an infection even though there's not and attacks itself."
Carlson's doctors keep her on steroids to keep inflammation down, and antibiotics to treat the immune suppression side effects of the steroids. On a good day, she's only taking 10 different prescriptions. On a bad day, it could be 20.
After her divorce, Carlson, who was a stay-at-home mother to four children for 24 years, discovered that while she was eligible for government assistance programs like Social Security, she didn't have the 10 or so years in the workforce required to be supported.
LD: So tell us a little bit about your hunt for health coverage.

Terri Carlson: Well, it really started a week ago this past Sunday when (Scott) Brown was elected to the Senate. On Christmas Eve, I was crying because they passed the health-care bill. I was so hopeful. I thought, "This is great. I'm going to have health coverage."
My COBRA runs out in May 2011. I was so excited because I have a life-long illness, and I have all of this genetic testing that they use as a scarlet letter to un-insure me. But when Brown was elected by Massachusetts, there was an article in the newspaper that said the health-care reform bill was on life support, and I thought, Oh my God. What's going to happen to me in a year?
Right now as it is, 90 percent of what I make just goes to pay my health care. Luckily I have my house, but if I didn't, I wouldn't be able to pay everything. I have a small savings left over from my divorce, but once that's over, I don't know what I'm going to do.
Are you not eligible for health care through your job?
This is what's ironic. I worked really hard to get a job with an organization -- I told them that I wouldn't mention the name -- that hires people with disabilities to work from home. So I have this job where I'm able to be productive and make money where I normally wouldn't, but everybody who works for the company is disabled and they can't get health care because the insurance company says, "Everybody who works for you is disabled. We're going to charge you a fortune to keep all of these disabled people on your policy."
It's infuriating, but here's the other thing that kind of ticks me off: All of the able-bodied workers who run the office, the healthy people, all have health care through the company. I feel so discriminated against. You can offer health care to them, but you can't offer health care to me? I was informed that they had something called a HIPAA, where you could go, and it's this new law where the insurance company has to keep you, but you know what they want? They want $1,200 a month. I only bring home $800 a month. And that's without food, shelter, anything. I would be in the hole almost $400 a month.
I'm literally the one who's caught in the middle. I work my ass off every day. I pay my taxes. And it came last Sunday where I'm just like, "What am I going to do?" I was in the hospital the day before yesterday. I got back from New York, collapsed and had a seizure. People don't understand. I look pretty good, but I suffer every day.
Where did the idea for the site and the YouTube videos come from?
This literally came out of my desperation. They're not going to pass health-care reform, so what are my options? Friends and I were joking, and one friend said, "Well, you could always marry some guy who has a good policy." And I thought, You know what. That's crazy. That's unbelievable, but it's my only option. It truly is my only option.
The first video came a week ago Sunday. I told a friend that I was going to do a video and post it on YouTube. She thought it was so funny. I had never done a video before. I'm just a mom. But I set it up and I did it. I did a serious one, a little woe-is-me -- asking for suggestions. Well, nobody clicked on it. My girlfriend said that it was because I needed to be sillier. She said they don't watch anything unless it's outrageous. So then I started to be more flirtatious. I tried to be more humorous, and then people started hitting on it. They started saying, "Oh my gosh, you need to do another one."
Then a friend suggested that I get the Web site that says Will Marry for Health Insurance. I went to GoDaddy.com, paid $1.99 for a year for the name and paid $5 for the site. So for $7 and a YouTube video, all of this happened.
How many responses have you had?
By the time I had my first interview with the media, I had 100 proposals. As of yesterday, I had 7,000 messages in my inbox from around the world. Half of those are probably proposals, and the other half are from suffering people. People just like me. They have the most heartbreaking stories. They're saying things like, "You're a voice for us," and "Please help us." It just breaks my heart.
I've also just got a contract where they want to do a reality series where they follow me as I go dates with these guys who've written in to my Web site. I'm looking at it right now. It's for a production company that produces it and then sells it to the network.
Are you thinking about doing it?
I really don't know. All I really wanted out of this was to just have health insurance or to be able to buy health insurance. My goal isn't to make any money, and I'm not sure I could do it with my health. I'm not making any decisions now.
You got so many actual propositions from men who have seen the videos, will you live up to your tag line? Will you marry someone for health insurance?
Before this idea came up, I was already looking for love. I was already on Match.com. When you're filling out something for a dating Web site you say that you want brown hair or blue eyes. I don't think that asking that someone have good health insurance is any different than asking for someone to be a certain religion. I think it's additional criteria. I think that out of all of these thousands of emails, I can have good health insurance and love at the same time. But I do know this: I wouldn't marry anyone without good health insurance. There's no way. I can't. But yes, I plan to be married within the next year.
Logistically speaking, how are you going to meet all of these men?
I've been so overwhelmed with all of the responses, but I'm going to go through every one and respond to everyone as best I can. It might take me a while, but I'm going to do that as soon as everything calms down a little bit. A lot of my proposals are from Massachusetts where they have universal care and a large portion are from Canada. People from Canada are really freaked out by this. This concept to people in Canada, it's surreal.
I mean how is it possible that I live in the wealthiest country in the world and can't get health insurance? One of the things I put in one of my videos -- and it's so true -- at one point I seriously thought about selling all of my assets, giving them to my children and going and robbing a bank. Because then I could go to jail and I could get three meals a day for free, I could work out and I could get health care.
I have a problem with the fact that I'm someone who works hard every day, and yet someone who is a drain on society and commits a crime can get better health care than me. I'm a hard-working person who's never had a speeding ticket. That just shows how screwed up our system is. This whole thing came out of my frustration and what I needed, but I realize that there are just so many other people right there with me.
So what do your friends and family think?
The people who have been friends of mine for a long time have sat with me as I've been in the hospital. They've seen me struggle and they've been worried. I mean, I almost died last year. In the hospital, I wrote President Obama. I wrote my local congressmen and senators, and they didn't even respond at all. Now all of a sudden I'm in the media, and I get messages on my phone saying, "Oh, we want to help." Well, no one wanted to help me a year ago when I was begging. It irritates me, but my friends are all proud of me. My children are proud of me. I have so much support.
What would you tell Congress or the president if you could have a conversation with them?
It would be simple: While you are all fighting between the Senate and the House and bickering, people like me are suffering and dying. While they're fighting, we're the ones suffering. I feel like the Republicans now are just trying to say no to everything instead of trying to make a point to pass the thing that they all agree upon, which is the pre-existing conditions clause. They're being stubborn children. People are suffering while they're taking their time.
The fact that you may need to depend on a spouse to survive feels like a throwback to Jane Austen. How does it feel to be a woman in the 21st century who may need to rely on a man to make it?
Well, I would say this: Wouldn't an illegal immigrant marry an American to have U.S. citizenship? It makes them dependent, but they're willing to do it so that they can come to our country. I don't think it's that different. I don't think it's prehistoric. It's not like an arranged marriage. I have a choice. I'm not just selling myself out to the first person who has health insurance. I have choices, but believe me, people have done a lot worse for a lot less.
Tell us: Would you marry for health care -- or what would you do if you were in Carlson's place?
More Good Stuff on the Web:
5 reasons why living alone rules (Lemondrop)
Who's your old man crush? Come on. Don't even front with us. (Lemondrop)
Can you date somebody whose English is... eh... not so good? (The Frisky)
The Gay Guy Who Made Me Believe in Love (Lemondrop)
The best snowball fight, ever? (FailBlog)












Comments:
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Tuesday 09 February
By Digi
or she could get her own ass a job and not moooooch off other people her whole life. Gimme a break what is with women these days? "you can take etc etc from so and so for doing etc'.Howabout just doing a friggin JOB instead of trying to sleeze your way into funds.
God women are pethetic these days, and this dumb skank is a prime example. Will Marry for health insurence are you kidding me. How shallow can you be. Plus her whole reason needing insurence is cause the deseased b***h cant get inusrence due to condition. WELL DUUUUH who wants to enter into a simple marriage of convenience (not passion, nore love) with a dying broad who cant provide anything but a 5 second blog story on AOL? Pethetic
Tuesday 09 February
By diane
well Dorathy, obviously you didn't read the article well, and have never had a serious illness like hers-- it doesn't matter how well she takes care of herself, her body makes her sick. how do i know this? i have also considered marriage purely for insurance. i am working full time (well, more than full time) now, but know that with a disease that causes thousands of precancerous polyps in my intestines (already had my colon removed), stage III kidney disease (not caused by me) and a blood disorder that causes me to get blood clots at the drop of a hat, i can end up in the hospital at the drop of a hat. and my liver has a shelf life of 5- 10 years (no i don't drink!) so taking care of your self doesn't always keep you healthy and if you cant get private insurance on your own, i bet you too would consider this option, especially if you medically couldn't work.
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Tuesday 09 February
By Digi
How typically woman of you. Considered myself to marry for insurence. GOd you women are pethetic. How many men considered getting married so they could have health insurence? LOL the only man who will marry a dumb broad like you and liek the chick this story is about is one thats Gay and doesnt want anyone else to be suspicious.
YOu shallow pieces of trash. Im glad the empty shells you consider a life will end with you in extreme deep seeded depression, and lack of life worth cause people like you truely are....worthless.
Tuesday 09 February
By Digi
PS
Im also quite desterubed by the way you described yourself you would even consider a marriage for insurence to be even ...viable. I mean come on, you're probably BARELY even worth looking at during the freakshow Halloween special on Animal Planet. YOu honestly think anyone who would even bother with ...dealing with a loser like you would at least want something appealing in their favor? What can you provide beisdes a possible combination of human bile on the bed each night?
You know they say fate works in mysterious ways and things happen to people for a reason......why dont you go...look in a mirror a good long time.........there Diane, is your reason.
Tuesday 09 February
By Scott McGregor
Problems with Marrying for Health Insurance
While Ms. Carlson's YouTube video has done a great job of dramatizing the desperation of many Americans without health insurance or who are in jeopardy of losing health insurance soon, and has yielded Ms. Carlson over 1000 proposals so far, there is a big problem with this strategy for getting health insurance here in the USA.
Let’s say Ms. Carlson meets someone who is single, and has health care through his job. It is still quite possible that she will lose that coverage again very soon. For instance, consider these possibilities:
Involuntary Unemployment. Three months later, the economy tanks again and his employer lets him go. Now he’s on Cobra until it runs out. If he becomes disabled while he is between jobs, he may find it hard to get another job in his field. He may find it had to get coverage, except at HIPAA rates due to his pre-existing condition.
Small Business insurance turmoil. Or maybe he owns a small business and has a policy for his family, and the families of his two employees. When his health insurance contact comes up for renewal, he finds that his former insurance company doesn’t want to offer him a new policy, because their claims costs have increased since he married her. So he starts shopping for a new policy with a different insurer, but for that size company they want to know about the expense levels for the previous year, they either choose not to offer him a corporate policy, or their rates are so high that none of his employees will be able to afford them.
Divorce. Coverage would end if the marriage ends divorce. The probability of divorce is even higher the second time around. COBRA Coverage may be available, but for only a limited time.
Death. Her husband could be struck and killed by a car while he is cross an intersection in the cross walk. COBRA Coverage may be available, but for only a limited time.
All these scenarios could leave her in the same no health care situation she is in today, looking for a new way to get affordable health insurance before her current policy or COBRA ends.
Reccomendation: Find Health insurance Not Dependent on Employment, or Marital Status
My recommendation is that Ms. Carlson amend her search and look only for men who can guarantee her PERMANENT health insurance — health insurance that she can keep even if he loses his job, can’t get his policy renewed, divorces her, or is killed.
Reside anywhere in the industrialized world (except the US!)
Her choices are not limited solely to choosing among Canadians and Americans who live in Massachusetts. All she needs to do is to marry someone who lives in ANY other industrial nation, or is willing and able to immigrate to any such country. Once she becomes naturalized in that country (or a legal resident of Massachusetts) she will have coverage that can’t be taken away from her regardless of what happens to her spouse.
That means she really can marry for love, she just needs to insist that after they marry they both are agreed that they will resided in a civilized part of the world where every resident is guaranteed health insurance, regardless of their marital status or current employment status. For someone who loves really her, that shouldn’t be too big a request to make.
States that ensure health insurance available to all
Perhaps by that time, there will be other progressive states like Massachusetts that rise to the challenge of providing health insurance for all their residents regardless of marital and current employment status. There is a growing movement to do so in California now.
Someday, USA?
Perhaps someday the conservative minority in the senate will decide that maintaining the health insurance status quo that keeps Terri and millions of other uninsured people in this mess is no longer preferable to even the weakest passable plan that ensures coverage for All Americans. And then at least some plan will pass that will ensure no American will ever again suddenly discover that their health insurance can disappear, or that the coverage they have will turn out to refuse to pay for the care they need.
Will All Americans Be Able to Access the “World’s Best Health Care“?
When that day comes maybe the supposed “World’s Best Health Care” the US has will be available to ALL American citizens, not merely some currently employed people, their spouses and minor children, and the wealthy foreigner’s of the world. Then Americans like Terri can enjoy the health security that citizens of the world’s other industrialized nations take for granted. Then Terri can live anywhere in the US — without her marital status affecting her health insurance coverage.
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Tuesday 09 February
By sspirited1
I am in a bad situation health-wise and financially, now. I wish each reader would send any donation to my Paypal account. Just a wish.
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Tuesday 09 February
By Glen
Staci, really sorry to hear about your suffering with hemorrhoids. Guess you've just got to quit bending over.
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Tuesday 09 February
By rebe51
If she has kids under 18 she is getting child support. You can receive food stamps even if you own your home. They use utilitiesand property taxes, rent and such to figure out food stamps. Something isn't right with the article. I also have an auto-immune disease, need my meds daily. They use gross income and include child support also to figure food stamps.. As far as women complaing about not being able to afford pap smears ans mamograms, they are free in every city. Call social services or a free clinic. There is a group in Va. that when they do the tests ans cancer is found they cover all medical pertaining to the cancer,. Chemo and all. There is help out there if she looks for it. I'm a widow with 2 grandkids and would never marry just for ins.. or security.. Would I trade my independence to marry a guy I really didn't know...never.. I have a low paying job, but I manage. I can come home and get into my pj's if I feel like it.. Money and ins. don't buy happiness. And no one knows what will happen to the person you marry for ins.. No gurantees with anyone's health.. She sounds very selfish and doesn';t sound very truthful.. Just another reality show wanna be..
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Tuesday 09 February
By Leslie
I understand completely where she is coming from. In the USA, I had no health coverage at all. I was a college student and wasn't covered by my school or by my parents. The school plan they did offer was more money per year then I made working a part time job during the semester and full time during school breaks. For someone who is pay for college, housing, food, and utilities this was not an option. When I got sick, I wasn't insured. I didn't have options. I know live and work in South Korea. I am an English teacher here. Isn't it funny that a 3rd world nation offers better health care FOR FOREIGNERS then the US has for its own citizens?
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Tuesday 09 February
By DAN
What really is the difference between this: receiving health insurance to marry a stranger than standing on A street corner PROSTITUTING your self ?
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Tuesday 09 February
By Wilde Childe
I think that it would be ruled a pre-existing condition and there fore under the rules of today she would be uninsurable. It may not be fraud, but it certainly is tacky. I guess that she is unaware of a lot or takes forgranted that the highway robbery plan that the anointed one is pushing, even if he has not read what it contains, will take care of her. No too many things that can go worng in this set up. No wonder she is a divorcee.
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Tuesday 09 February
By Tiger Lil
There has been a genetic problem discovered in my family. I did have an offer of genetic testing but declined as I don't want to know. I am close to 70 and at this point don't care. It also keeps me from being declared uninsurable from a preexisting condition.
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Tuesday 09 February
By Annedyth.
Would I marry for health Insurance? no.
I wish this lady, luck however
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Tuesday 09 February
By helper
Jesus can fix anything. She should find a spirit filled church and let them lay hands on her and pray for her ! It works with a little faith.
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Tuesday 09 February
By gary tucci
so, your kinda like a prostitute then huh???
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Tuesday 09 February
By Eric
Do the reality show and get the money you want. Once upon a time people married for richer or poorer in sickness and in health. No one keeps there end of the bargain, anyway. What if the fool that marries you loses his job and insurance? You would do better with the reality show for money. Then let someone use you for their love of money.
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Tuesday 09 February
By rdmandar
This just goes to show you how stupid some americans are.
The obama plan is a ruse, did she read the plan.
There are only 31000000 people without insurance, less than 10% of americans.
To top it off the number does not take into account that 1/2 of them don't want insurance.
YOU CAN't FIX STUPID !
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Tuesday 09 February
By Debbie
What everyone seems to forget here -- pre-existing......what insurance can she get when they refuse due to medical issues. Let the Senators and Congressman get the same kind of insurance some of us with just a few simple problems have...you can not get a good plan that covers everything....I'm employed by my mother (as her caregiver, she has dementia) She pays me from her own money…I pay MORE IN TAXES because I am now self-employed (HOW ABOUT THAT AS ANOTHER ISSUE WE HAVE – why do I even have to pay taxes on money she already paid taxes on) and I have to pay for my insurance. The only coverage I could get costs me $400 a month, $750 must be paid before they pay a thing and I have to pay 20% of any testing I get. A simple chest x-ray cost $525 and I must pay $43. Now think of someone with a significant health issue…what cost would that add up to. How many senior who worked hard all they life and paid their taxes…now end up divorcing just to get medical coverage for their partners. There is something wrong with that picture. If you’re poor you may get help but if you’re just above that line you get penalized. Something needs to be done; I and many others want the fair chance to have good health care and a chance to a good life.
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Tuesday 09 February
By Ustand4what
Partial fix**** Low cost college tuition to those wanting to seriously(A - B grade student) be in the Medical field so they don't graduate and feel they have to charge so much to re-coup money spent.
Lower their(the doctor's) liability cost by having the patient waive their right to sue over a certain figure cap in exchange to get low cost everyday care when needed.
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Tuesday 09 February
By Erika
How pathetic it is that we have come to this
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