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We're back again for another edition of GuySpeak/GirlSpeak, where we take a close look at the advice given by guys to girls over at GuySpeak, throw in our own two vagina-possessing cents, and then have you weigh in. This week's scintillating question: Can you turn a booty call into a boyfriend?

This guy uses me as a booty call, but I really like him, so whenever he calls I go meet him. Should I play hard to get and stop answering his calls? He always avoids my questions about a relationship.
Read on for our guy vs. girl advice ...


Wise-ass Cary McNeal is back to handle the guy speaking side of things, and he says what we all thought when we read this question: It's nearly impossible to add strings to a no-strings-attached relationship.

The Wise-ass wonders, "Why would he complicate things when all he has to do is pick up the phone and call you whenever he gets horny?" If he's getting sex without any work, there's no motivation for him to stop, and I have to agree.

McNeal warns that if this guy wanted a relationship with you, he would have made a move by now, but suggests that if you want to give it a try, let him know you want more and find out if he wants more too. Whatever his answer is, that's where your decision-making begins: do you stay or do you go?

You don't want to disrupt the arrangement unless it's to start an actual relationship with this guy, and he is avoiding your questions about relationships because he doesn't want to disrupt the booty that he's getting. You both want different things, and you're both holding your breath.

When I see people doing things that don't seem to be beneficial for them, like you sleeping with a guy who won't answer your questions about relationships, I try to remember that people are generally only going to do things that bring them some rewards.

Sleeping with this guy is doing something good for you -- maybe it's how you feel when you're together, like he's all yours; maybe you feel that at some point he'll realize that he's in love with you; maybe these little pockets of intimacy are all you are able to handle at this point in time.

But like the ability to fly, booty call relationships only work as long as you don't think too much about them. Now that you've started thinking about this, you have to do something about it. I don't think that playing hard to get will work with this guy. I think instead you're going to have to put on your big girl pants and talk to him.

If I were you, and I have been you before, I would sit down and think through where you'd like your relationship with this guy to be in a perfect world. What do you want from him exactly, and what are you willing to do if you don't get what you want?

When you're ready, talk to him. Tell him what you want from him, and why. Don't try to make excuses or belittle your own needs and wants, just be honest. If he says he doesn't want a relationship with you, hear that.

Sleeping with him after this conversation shows him that you are OK with being a booty call only. Just remember, and good lord, I sound like my mother, but guys take their cues on how to treat you based on how you treat yourself.

Ultimately, if you like a guy, and he likes you, but just having this conversation is enough to scare him away, you are better off without him. You are worth a commitment (should you want one), and you deserve someone who can be honest and adult about issues concerning the genitals. If he can't handle it, find a man who can.

What do you think? Ladies, have you ever turned a booty call into a boyfriend? Guys, have you ever avoided relationship talks with booty calls in order to prolong the booty? What would you do in this situation? Tell us in our ridiculously lively comments!

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