Sure there are men that are good gift-givers. For Kelly Osbourne's recent birthday, her fiance, model Luke Worrall, replaced her engagement diamond with ... a bigger diamond (nice!). But (sorry guys) for the most part, men have earned the rep for struggling in the gift-giving department for good reason. We get that gift giving is a minefield for guys, so here we present a couple of true gift-giving horror stories for your empathy/edification.
Size Anxiety
Even something as innocuous as a sweater can be a disaster present ... especially if it's the wrong size. (We have a house full of clothes, fellas! Look at the tag, why don't you?!) Just ask Jason, 32, who, upon seeing the look of horror on the face of his girlfriend when he gave her a size L top, quickly told her he thought she needed the larger size because she was "well-endowed."
"The recovery was so funny, I couldn't stay upset," the remaining anonymous girlfriend said.
A Rose by Any Other Name ...
Flowers are a standard for men in gift giving. It's a present that can be shopped for remotely, and there aren't many girls out there that don't appreciate a huge bouquet. Aside from being a nice spruce-up for your cube or apartment, they're a great way to show off how much healthier and smooch-filled your relationship is than your friends' and co-workers'.
So you might think you can't mess things up when it comes to flowers, but think again: When Cathi, 30, was a sophomore in college, her boyfriend of seven months lived back in her hometown.
She had regaled her sorority sisters with stories about her man, but they hadn't gotten a chance to meet him yet. When her birthday rolled around, flowers were delivered to the door of the sorority house, and all the sisters gathered around. "The card read, 'Happy Birthday to a great friend,'" Cathi recalls. It turns out; her boyfriend didn't have a credit card and asked his mom to send the flowers for him. "He had asked her to send the flowers, but the card was all her," Cathi says. "She was still in denial about him having a girlfriend, and it was completely mortifying. All my sorority sisters thought I had fabricated this boyfriend! Needless to say, we got in a pretty big fight about it."
The Gift That Keeps On ...
Five years ago, I was casually dating a guy named Jimmy. We hadn't been dating very long when the holidays rolled around, so we were in that awkward, 'do you or don't you' place with gifts. My solution was to stuff the king of all stockings for him. He was an avid college football fan-despite no longer living in Alabama, he traveled every weekend to Auburn's home and away games. So I bought an Auburn stocking and filled it with team paraphernalia, from socks to pencils, and then topped it off with his favorite candy. One day, while we were on the phone making dinner plans, Jimmy informed me that he was at the mall buying his mother's Christmas gift: Beautiful by Estée Lauder. (Sweet guy, buying perfume for his mom. Right? Read on.)
Our Christmas date arrived, and the stocking was a big hit. Then, Jimmy presented me with a small box. Inside the box was a make-up bag emblazoned with 'Estée Lauder', and inside it were miniature bottles of perfume: Beautiful, Pleasures, Intuition ... you get the drift? For you non-shoppers out there, it was a gift with purchase! As in, he bought a gift for his mom, and gave me the free holiday promotional item. Hello! Estée Lauder invented the gift with purchase. (True story!)
They may say that it's the thought that counts, but remember: You actually have to think for that adage to apply.
Tell Us: What's the worst gift you've ever gotten? Have you ever given a crappy gift?
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Tuesday 01 December
By Kimberly
It was my first birthday as a newlywed. My husband went out and filled a box full of goodies from a well known "import" shop. As I started to go through the contents, I was a bit confused as some of the contents were things I would never use. My confusion turn to irritation as he reached into the box and removed things, telling me "oh, that's for me... that's mine too!" He then had the gall to tell me "When I filled the box, it looked so empty that I bought some gifts for myself so it would seem fuller!"
After 16 years of marriage I have NEVER let him live that down.
Reply
Monday 21 December
By High Desert Chick
Good for you! A gal after my own heart!
Tuesday 01 December
By Heirloom Tomato
I don't believe those tiny perfume bottles are a "gift with purchase" item. They are small (and cute) but I don't think they are ever given away. I have seen those little sets for $25 in department stores at Christmas time. He probably was not sure what she would like so he wanted to offer her a choice.
Reply
Tuesday 01 December
By Erin
Actually, they are free. I get them all the time. Sometimes it's free make-up, and if I purchase perfume, I get free samples of different perfumes. It also comes with a make up bag... just like in the story. So yes.. her boyfriend gave her the free samples as a gift, lol.
Tuesday 01 December
By merg
You are wrong, heirloom tomato.
I just received some with an estee lauder purchase of youth dew.
I get them all the time. They are really small, and I see nothing cute about them. They are samples, nothing more.
Saturday 05 December
By skwerl
You're a guy, right? Those tiny bottles are samples. DUH
Monday 21 December
By skippers
no, that's a free gift with purchase, I have tons of them ;)
Monday 21 December
By Brynne MacDonnell
It actually is a gift with purchase. I just bought Estee Lauder perfume for my mother and recieved the exact same thing mentioned by the writer.
Monday 21 December
By Pamela
They are a gift with purchase during the holidays because I got a set when I bought perfume for myself...
Monday 21 December
By Karyn
Actually, I believe they are talking about the TEENSY little bottle of fragrance that are given out as samples of designer fragrances. I've been given handfuls when I've been at the department store purchasing a designer fragrance. It's relatively inexpensive for them and allows for promotion of their fragrance.
And by teensy, I mean they contain maybe 20 drops of fragrance.
Monday 21 December
By lee
What planet are you from? Yes, they were a promo, especially with the Estee Lauder name on the bag.
Tuesday 01 December
By Karen
My ex-husband gave me a knife sharpener for Christmas one year! I finally had to resort to giving him a list with the item, color, size, and what store to buy it from if I wanted something that didn't make me burst out into tears. Thus, it explains why he is my EX-husband!
Reply
Monday 21 December
By lor
Your comment reminded of an item I saw in a catalogue called "The Ex". It's a knifeblock shaped like a man. LOLOL
Monday 21 December
By Paul
Lucky for him that he's your X, anyone who would make a list of what she should be given doesn't deserve a husband or a gift. I wouldn't give you the time of day.
Tuesday 01 December
By wendtjanet
The worst present I ever received was one m mother in law gave me and my husband...one bed pillow. Apparently TWO pillows went over her meager budget, so we got one to share.
Reply
Saturday 05 December
By skwerlz
Aren't mother-in-laws just gems?
Tuesday 01 December
By Robert
I always knew women were shallow ,but geez, its IS the thought that counts ladies ,Be lucky he DID'NT give you a "Chia pet" for crying out loud !! I have had ex-girlfriends give me horrible gifts as well ,Like nasty smelling AVON cologne an old man wouldn't even wear !! I think the REAL moral to all of this is use your head and really find the right gift instead of faking it!
Reply
Monday 21 December
By Amanda
For the most part, I agree it is the thought that counts, and people who complain of those "faux pas" gifts (like getting kitchen utensils) are being petty and stuck-up. Personally, I would MUCH rather get a gift that I can use, but maybe I'm just being too practical! But if the gift is actually offensive (like many of these seem), than that's a completely different story. A gift should at least seem like the person CARES. If it does, than it really doesn't matter what the gift actually is...
Monday 21 December
By lynn
ok i hope that was years ago because men's cologne has come along way in recent years in AVON.... WE NOW have people like Derrik Jetter and Patric Dempsey line of mens products hell some of the mens stuff smell better than the expensive stuff you get at department stores.. she must have bought you wild country or something that has been out for years and is for the older gentlemen..... Dont dog the Avon man lol look in the books once in a while there is more in there than you think
Monday 21 December
By boo2ran
Yes, Robert, it IS the thought that counts. Giving someone a gift of the free samples shows little thought. When one gives a gift, the aim should be to give something that is pleasing to the receiver which shows you made an effort--aka put some THOUGHT into the gift.
People who just grab something and present it are not thoughtful givers and it is blatantly obvious there was no thought.
So, if it is the thought that counts... put some thought into it!