Lisa Wexler: Call It Hormone Addition Therapy and Make a Deal
Dori Hartley: Russell Crowe Saved My LIfe
Coughing into the phone and pretending you're sick while calling your boss is for amateurs, as a Colorado man demonstrated when he stabbed himself in the leg so he wouldn't have to work his shift at an Edgewater, Colo., Blockbuster video. According to the Denver Post, Aaron Seibers, 29, told police that three people dressed in black attacked him, and that he couldn't tell if his attackers were Hispanic or skinheads. That's when authorities started a manhunt. The hoax was revealed when police examined surveillance footage of the area and found no evidence of an attack.
Stabbing yourself, of course, is extreme, but there are many other creative ways to get out of work. On a whim, I once hopped a flight to London with a friend and called in sick from a pay phone in Jolly Old England.
Check out what some Lemondroppers have done (or at least what they'll admit to):
Andrea: "I faked a car accident. I had really bad morals in college."
Lauren: "I hate to say it, but I said I had a 'family emergency' in Philly, which was code for going to the outlet mall with my new boyfriend for the day. I even kept emailing "updates" from my Blackberry as I was trying on clothes ... Oy. I look back and realize now what an idiot I was. (And the bf didn't last either!)"
Julieanne: "I may be the WPE for this, but when I was taking telephone orders for an Old Timey Products catalog, I was out all night drinking and showed up extra late to work, looking haggard. To avoid getting canned, I said that my older brother had threatened suicide and I was up all night with him. To be fair, I don't have an older brother. Also, to be fair, I was making six dollars an hour, and they made everybody work exactly 39 hours a week so they didn't have to give us benefits. I felt pretty bad when my supervisor said to take the day off and gave me a hug, but mostly I hate to be touched."
Erin: "I once told a really demanding client I had appendicitis just to get a moment's peace. And there was the time I was returning from a trip to Italy and missed my connection in Paris. Technically it wasn't my fault (the airline even hooked me up with a free room and meal vouchers), but when the gate agent said I couldn't get on a flight to NYC for 24 hours, I think my response was: Yippee!"
Have you ever done something outlandish to get out of work?
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Wednesday 04 November
By Mike
I was over a girls house had too much to drink night before did not go in but called around noon and said I was tied to bed. Instead of being reprimanded I was bosses hero.
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Thursday 05 November
By Allee
One day I called in to work. I said I amy not be back for a few days. My boss asked why, and I said I am in the hospital with severe pancreatitis. What sucked was it was true. It was the most painful three days of my life. But my boss cleared my schedule and I did not have to return to work for two weeks. It actually took longer to recover. But two weeks of no work stress was helpful.
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Thursday 05 November
By Laura Babberl
I once had a staff fake a carjacking to get out of work. She reported it to the police and worked with a sketch artist to develop a composite of the perpetrator. As if this isn't enough, the sketch looked like a cross between one of her co-workers and my boss.
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Friday 06 November
By stoo
when working at a hotel bar i came in the hungest-over i have ever been, but through some inventive method acting managed to convince my boss and other staff members i had flu. So good was my performance that they sent me home with jars of honey and some lemons for my "sore throat"
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