Everyone's talking about this week's New York Times Magazine cover story about Barack and Michelle Obama's marriage. In it, the president and the first lady cop to the realities of partnership -- mainly that it's hard work and sometimes sucks.
Jodi Kantor's article questions whether equality is possible after you've exchanged marriage vows with is the freaking President of the United States. The Obamas -- who still keep up with regular date nights -- show that a good relationship takes hard work and honesty.
The story explores the Obamas' sacrifices throughout their 17-year marriage, like how the pair hasn't spent much time under the same roof until now.
Barack has missed out on parts of his daughters' childhoods. Michelle at one point told him, "Well, you're gone all the time and we're broke. How is that a good deal?" Plus, Michelle has put her own blood, sweat and tears into her husband's political career while sacrificing her own professional life.
But let's not forget that for all the sacrifices she made during Barack's absenteeism and long hours, Michelle now gets to enjoy money, power, respect, travel, time with her kids, material comforts and adoration from many the world over.
And even if Barack gets elected to another term, it will not be impossible for her to resurrect her own career in her early 50s when her kids are about to go to college. There are plenty of organizations that would be thrilled to hire a former first lady.
So maybe we shouldn't be so caught up on whether or not the Obamas have an equal marriage as much as a loving, honest, evolving one. They haven't, thus far, put on a front like many other famous twosomes.
Michelle doesn't seem the type who would grin and bear it if her husband had a dalliance with an intern. Maybe the Obamas are marking the end of a long line of high-profile couples who've acted like everything is all right when it ain't.
The takeaway from the story is that having a strong, mostly happy marriage isn't easy, but it's still worth fighting for. Hell, if the president and the first lady can strive for it, there's no reason why the rest of us can't.
Tell us: Is your relationship like the Obamas? Would you want it to be?
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Thursday 29 October
By J.S.Bridges
"Is your relationship like the Obamas?"
Absolutely - it's JUST LIKE that! We even still have "date nights," three or four times a month - that is, when I'm not out of town on my job, of course.
'Course, we don't have Secret Service escorts - and we don't fly to NYC on a custom-fitted airliner for dinner and a show - and we have to pay for a sitter for the kids...
Otherwise - it's EXACTLY THE SAME!!
BTW:
"Maybe the Obamas are marking the end of a long line of high-profile couples who've acted like everything is all right when it ain't."
What is this "long line" of which you write?
If memory serves, the ONLY Prez in the last - oh - forty-plus years or so who was connected with any sort of "dalliance" at all, much less one that made his marriage a somewhat-shaky sham, was ol' Slick Willie Clintoon...
Ronald Reagan, both Bushes - their marriages were all rock solid - no "line" there...
Even Jimmeh The P-Nut only "lusted in his heart" where other women were concerned.
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Friday 30 October
By Elle
Whoa, the sarcasm...and the bitterness. Geez.
Just because noone tried to impeach either of the Bush men or Reagan (and I wont make an argument about whether or not that was warranted, as clearly noone will ever succeed in an equal exchange of political opinion with you) doesn't mean that the marriages behind them were 'rock solid'.
Moreover this article points to the Obamas being a first couple that are open about the hard work their relationship is because that effects the way people perceive them. A platform of honesty, in a relationship, or the oval office is important. Building strong family units is part of creating a healthier, happier country. Call it leading by loose example, and quite simply, if you need a concrete model you're looking in the wrong place.
Friday 30 October
By Lo
It says "high profile" couple, not political couple. Aren't there a lot of celebrity couples who have been involved in scandals? And even it was political there are people besides presidents, Eliot Spitzer for one, who have had affairs and once they admitted to them their wives just stood by.
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Monday 09 November
By Laurie Bixler
I am incredibly thrilled with the flat out honesty of this couple in acknowledging that marriage can be tough and have bumps and sacrifices. I do not know of any couple, married long term, who has not had issues and problems and times of really lousy moments. Kudos for truth! I work with my husband and our relationship always has ups and downs. We have agreed not to ever divorce so we have to go with the flow. It is all about commitment.
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Monday 16 November
By SickoftheObamas
Ha Ha what a laugh. Of course they did not spend much time in the same house because he was off trying to Change the world. He is an arrogant man who thinks his world view is the only world worth living in. So he ran around with Radicals trying to show everyone the right way to change the country. And they say Sarah Palin is unqualified while Barry Sataro ( his real name before he picked that cute name) never having ran anything, not a mayor, not a governor, Just a community organizer who "some" think makes him qualified to be a president. Well how is tha hope and change working out for you guys now. Just ask the people in New York.
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