You probably give better advice than most paid advice columnists, right? Mike has a question and we think you can help. Leave a comment with your advice.Mike's quandary:
"So there's this girl I used to see years ago. We dated for a short while and the sex was phenomenal, but we ultimately didn't work out.
"I enjoy bumping into her; we work in the same field. I'd love to hang out with her again. I know what you're thinking but that's not what I'm after -- I really do enjoy hanging with her.
"I can sense she is keeping her distance because she knows the chemistry will lead us to the bedroom, which will just complicate the friendship. What's a good way to let her know I'm interested in spending time with her in the street, not the bedroom?"
About our Charity Case: Mike, a freelance illustrator from Chicago, loves indie rock and is obsessed with one day building a tree house."I enjoy bumping into her; we work in the same field. I'd love to hang out with her again. I know what you're thinking but that's not what I'm after -- I really do enjoy hanging with her.
"I can sense she is keeping her distance because she knows the chemistry will lead us to the bedroom, which will just complicate the friendship. What's a good way to let her know I'm interested in spending time with her in the street, not the bedroom?"
Got a question? Need some girl advice? Contact us at julie@lemondrop.com and we'll make sure you get the help you want!
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Saturday 03 October
By Christina
I don't believe you don't want sex and I don't think she will either. Even if you truly don't have that motivation... you admitted yourself that the chemistry would inevitably lead to sex. If you really want to become just friends, you're going to need to be very patient. Don't ask her to hang out until you've "bumped into" each other at least a few times over many months. Don't in any way act as if you're pursuing her, even as a friend. She will probably interpret it as a booty call.
Wait to see how she reacts to seeing you. Does she make a lot of lingering eye contact? Does she seem flirty? She probably wants sex. Does she smile genuinely when she sees you? Does she seem interested in what you've been up to? Then you may have a shot at hanging out just as friends. Does she act like she's in a hurry? Answer your questions briefly? Look everywhere but at your eyes? You're out of luck. She's not interested in a rekindling of any kind.
Of course this is just my opinion and every woman reacts differently to situations like this. You know her better than I do.
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Saturday 03 October
By sanderson283
Bad Idea..............An x and I stayed close, we great friends , but I.n just about getting over the fact that he doesn't want me as a lover anymore.
I started babysitting for his toddler, the first time he made it clear that I was NOT to sleep over.
Tonight was a nightmare.
He asked me to babysit, and got back pretty late..............the minute he walked in his cell and house phone came alive....................he then hid in the bathroom to continue his conversation, and I feel asleep...............he freaked out when he realized i was still there......................he'd made a date , and she was on her way over. He just forgot to tell me. I even got to meet her. (on my way out)
This man isn't my friend, and he can find a new babysitter.
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Saturday 03 October
By Ginger
What's a good way to let her know? TELL HER. Sheesh. Of course, her reluctance to get a friendship going with you now could have their roots in your previous dating relationship. At this point, you're just guessing as to why she's keeping her distance, probably because you'd like to think she still wants to jump your bones. I'll bet there is a reason/reasons other than that. But you'll never know unless you ask.
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Saturday 17 October
By Lisa
Dude who are you kidding? Deep down you're looking for a "friends with benefits" arrangement and you know it. She probably doesn't want to waste time on guys who aren't "the one" and rightly so, life it too short. Leave the girl alone, sounds like she's happy without you.
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