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The Couple Identifying Characteristics: This two-headed friend never goes anywhere without its "better" half and answers direct questions with "We." Bleh.
Remember that time that you hung out with your gal pal without her boyfriend tagging along? You don't? That's because it NEVER HAPPENED. He's ALWAYS HANGING AROUND. Like a puppy. Or a particularly virulent virus.
Field Study: Melanie's good friend Heidi and her boyfriend David have been together for five years. And that was the last time she and Heidi hung out alone. "She brings him EVERYWHERE," says Melanie. "To our girl's brunches. To dinner. Out shopping. I have no idea why he would want to come to Forever 21 with us. That's just weird."
Read more after the jump!
Celebrity Couple Example: Heidi and Spencer Pratt; Alex and Simon Van Kempen ("Real Housewives of New York").
Why You Keep the Couple Around: You knew her before she was in a relationship. Plus, maybe he's not inherently annoying. Still, sometimes it takes expressly telling her that you want to hang out with her solo for The Couple to get it through their thick and completely attached skulls.
Got a Friend Terrorist -- a super-toxic friend -- you want to tell us about? Share your story in the comments or drop us a line! We promise we'll change all identifying characteristics and incriminating details!
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Friday 31 July
By Vittoria Lynn
I'm going to change their names to keep their identity private.
My friend, who is a sister more than a friend, "Liv" has this boyfriend "Tom". They've been dating for, maybe, about three months, but within those four months, it hasn't been just us girls. God forbid she is away from him, then she's texting him. Don't get me wrong, "Tom" is pretty cool - we share a lot of interests and he's nice, but "Liv" and "Tom" are closer than a pair of Siamese twins. Just the other day, I asked her to hang out with me and two other friends she hasn't seen since June, and she said she couldn't because she "wants to spend some time with" "Tom".
Every morning, at 8:30am, he goes to her house is with her until usually 11 at night, unless he sleeps over (he's also her brother's friend). I haven't even laid eyes on her for the past two weeks because I really don't want to be around her if he's attached at the hip.
And don't get me started on the PDA when it's just the three of us, and I become the enormous third wheel.
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