Lemondrop Tests: Will Smooth Away make my skin glow?You know what the bearded lady's problem was? Too much hair. Everywhere. I'm not exactly a bearded lady, but I'm always on the lookout for ways to destroy my diabolical follicles.
Enter Smooth Away, a pad covered with super-fine crystals that, according to the box, buffs hair right off a girl's face. Easier than the no!no! hair burner? Safer than razor blades? Zang!
Less than 20 minutes later, I was home rubbing off my hair in the recommended "gentle, circular" motion and enjoying the fact that I was getting a decent facial at the same time.
Hair and dead skin cells, removed for less than $10? I was in heaven, and the glow showed. When I finished, I was smooth, exfoliated and ready to make Smooth Away my new best friend.
Twelve hours later I woke up to a face that looked like hamburger meat. I was molting from the neck up. Angry red patches of diced-up skin along my jaw line and upper lip made my worst nightmare come true: I was the bearded lady, only instead of hair, I had scabs. For the next week, I walked around looking like I had been styled by a bag of gravel. And when my skin grew back, so did my hair. Only now, hirsutism is no longer my biggest fear -- Smooth Away is.
Price: $14.99 plus shipping and handling
Rating: 1 out of 5 ShamWows
Jenny Muller is a beauty writer from San Francisco.
Bizarre Spa Treatments
10. Arctic Ice Room
The Qua Spa at Caesar's Palace Las Vegas offers an "Arctic Ice" treatment room, where "snow" falls from a domed ceiling through mint-infused air chilled to 55 degrees Fahrenheit.
Jae C. Hong, AP
9. Golf Ball Massage
After hitting the links at Scottsdale's Four Seasons Resort at Troon North, you can have a "therapist" warm up some golf balls, and roll them along the large muscles of your spine and neck.
Jupiter Images
8. Doctor Fish Pedicure
A type of carp called garra rufa, or "doctor fish," are used during pedicures at Yvonne Hair and Nails salon in Alexandria, Va. The fish eat dead areas of the skin, leaving just healthy new flesh behind.
Jacquelyn Martin, AP
7. Flaming Anti-Flu Treatment
A man in the Jiaxing Zhejiang province of China undergoes a medicated fire treatment. The procedure is supposed to help prevent colds and flu.
Getty Images
6. Gold Facial Treatment
Japan's Umo Inc. claims that covering the face with sheets of 24-carat gold is an effective (if not cost effective) method of fighting off wrinkles.
Junko Kimura, Getty Images
5. Snake Massage
In the Israeli village of Talmey El'Azar, where reptile farmer/aesthetician Ada Barak uses tangles of king, corn and milk snakes in her massage treatments. Barak claims that find the creatures to be soothing.
Yonathan Weitzman, Reuters
4. Nightingale Droppings
If snakes aren't cuttin' it, you can always rely on ol' fashioned bird poo. Spas such as Shizuku in NYC offer facials with nightingale droppings, which contain an enzyme that supposedly brightens the skin.
Jewel Samad, AFP / Getty Images
3. Leeches
Demi Moore may be using these bloodsuckers for detox treatments, but in the Himalayan region of Jammu And Kashmir, leeches are used to treat a variety of ailments including blood disorders and immunity problems.
Awar Nazir, Scoopt / Getty Images
2. Bull Semen Hair Conditioning
Bull semen conditioner is one of the new offerings of Hari's Salon in London. Hari's claims that the substance, when combined with a protein rich plant root, Katera, strengthens and adds shine to hair.
Morry Gash, AP
1. Knife Therapy
A man cringes as he receives a "knife therapy" massage during a free procedure in Taipei. Local practitioners in this ancient form of massage claim it can cure sinus infections and headaches.
Steven Wang, AP












Comments:
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Thursday 09 July
By Heather
I bought the smooth away after my friend had used it and raved that it actually worked, i never believe that any of the infomercials I see actually work. I got it and while I enjoy the effect there is so much work involved in getting it as smooth as I like and (maybe I'm doing it wrong) it does not seem to last long at all.
It works but doesn't seem worth the effort..
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Thursday 09 July
By J Dahlen
I've used the Smooth Away on my calves twice and find it effective. I followed instructions to have clean dry skin, rub gently and apply moisturizing lotion afterward. As a diabetic I asked my care giver about the cautions listed. She said it is an abrasive (sandpaper, as noted) and does make minute scratches on the skin. This opens a vulnerable person up to possible infections so she'd rather I use something else but said just to keep an eye out for signs of irritation the could lead to infection.
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Thursday 09 July
By Nedaichka
i bought it....i didnt have scabs or bumps...but for me...it didnt take off all the hair evenly and then...it grew back the next day as if i shaved....i hated it....horrible product....
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Thursday 09 July
By kim
Again a product that has been around for decades.
When going through my Grandmother's things after her death I ran across a sandpaper holder with instructions to use it the same way this is meant to be used. I couldn't help myself, I tried it. Oh, by the way, the date on the manufacturers directions was 1940.
But anyway, I used the directions and sanded my legs. Biggest problem was it took over an hour (for each leg), I could have shaved in 10 minutes and the hair grew back just as quickly as if I had shaved. No way would I be tempted to buy one of these gadgets.
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Saturday 11 July
By D
I bought a set from HSN about 6 years ago - these things always come back - it was so stupid - why would I think it would work? I didn't use it long enough to hurt myself but it became very clear very quickly it wasn't removing any hair at all. I can't believe this company still makes this product - they must have a return rate of 95% - not everyone is lazy like me and just didn't bother.
By the way-you are very funny - enjoy your "reviews"
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Saturday 18 July
By ov3rl0rd
you should have read the instructions more carefully. they say that if you want to try it on your face, test it in a small, unnoticable area and wait a day to see if you have any reactions to it. Then they say that if you do have a bad reaction, discontinue using the product on that area. I have one, and it works great on my arms and legs but not anywhere else.
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Friday 24 July
By Swed
I Bought smooth away at target... ITS AWSOME!!! I had started shaving my legs since I was 8 because I have ALWAYS been a fuzzy kid. And over 10 years of shaving and its still been a nightmare. I have tried everything for my legs and I end up with gnarly burns, bumps, rashes, AND CUTS!!! Of course I have fuzzy arms too but I never wanted to shave too much of my arms for fear it grows back quicker... and it does!! But I bought smooth away and its my new favorite thing, I have showed it to all my friends. I noticed a lot of people just jump to using it with out READING HOW TO!! For people like me... IF YOU HAVE LONGER HAIR cut it first so its not more than 1/4 of a inch, and 3 circles clockwise and 3 circles counter clock wise.... ALSO SUPER IMPORTANT, the paper quaility wears if you push too hard... I BARELY had to apply any pressure to get the BEST results. I also applied lotion INSTANTLY after. I had first it on my arms first and ITS WONDERFUL, my boyfriend LOVES how much softer my skin is, and i love how it works!! Another great plus for me is i have skin cancer so i have to be really careful with what i use and it makes my skin extremely fair and SENSATIVE. this is a WONDERFUL product, wish they had it in the 90'S!!
USE IT....**just READ INSTRUCTIONS**
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Monday 27 July
By rockglam33
i tried smooth away and i followed the instructions but the results sucked! it shortened the hair and made my legs look like their were smooth and hairless. but if you were to run your hand over it their was stubble. imagine your legs a day or 2 after you shave.... i would not recommend this to anyone. its not worth it...
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Monday 27 July
By Stephanie
I bought this product.. Curious to see if it would work, I used it immediately after getting home from the store. It worked really great on my arms and legs.. I even used the little one on my face. I didn't break out and it left my skin nice and smooth. I love this product... It works GREAT!
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Thursday 06 August
By AW
My mother has actually done the same thing with super-fine sandpaper (you know, the standard sort sold in hardware stores or the 'home improvement' sections of mega-stores) for years, however, she only uses it on her legs.
Seems to work pretty well as an alternative to shaving, even if it does appear odd to see your mom sitting in the living room and rubbing her legs with sandpaper.
Caveat: She's got fairly fine, light leg hair, and if she skips a few too many days and the hair gets long-ish, it doesn't work and shaving must be resorted to; I'm not so certain the sandpaper (or overpriced infomercial product) method would work out so well with thicker hair if it were longer than stubble, or at all.
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