As with other big concepts ("love," "date," "fat-free"), it seems Americans can't quite agree on the definition of sex. Sure, we can all agree on a certain classic act, but according to a recent study from the Kinsey Institute, we can't come to a consensus on what else counts as sex. The interesting part is that women are less likely than men to consider oral sex or mutual masturbation "having sex." In fact, only 37 to 46 percent of women consider ye olde blow-jays to be "real sex" compared to 44 to 52 percent of men.
Find out why after the jump.
"These data make it clear that general agreement regarding what constitutes having 'had sex' and how sexual partners are counted cannot be taken for granted," said researchers Stephanie Sanders and June Reinisch.
Of course, considering the fact that for many women, hooking up is still something to be ashamed of, we're not surprised that our definition of "what counts" is narrower than a man's. After all, for a lot of dudes, sex is usually something to brag about, whether it's first base or third.
What do you think? Should sex be defined as the old in-out, in-out, or is that definition a little too restrictive? Let us know!
Comments:
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Wednesday 01 July
By rodney
Nothing less than vaginal intercourse counts as having had sex.
Reply
Wednesday 01 July
By braxxy poo
heyy,
actually, most girls that consider themselves virgens dont consider most stuff sex.
mostly, all of my virgen girl friends will do oral/anal and all that but they still consider themself virgens.
other girls that arent virgens, if there willing to do oral, there willing to have sex with that guy.
Reply
Wednesday 01 July
By lauren
"ye olde blow-jays" ???? Hahahahahahahaha
Reply
Wednesday 01 July
By cbolton210
Anything you do to purposefully arouse another person sexually and bring them to orgasm is sex... whether that be by masturbation, oral sex, or intercourse.
Reply
Wednesday 01 July
By ashley
I totally agree with you.
Thursday 02 July
By George
well then... im having sex with myself right now i had to type this with 1 hand...
Wednesday 01 July
By Ramon Bass
God wanted both men and women to have sex. If it Adam had not eaten from
the tree of life there would be no people on earth. Yes the wedding vougs and the bible say it is wrong to have sex out of marrage. Of the millions of people on earth how many have not had sex out of wedlock. How many have not had sex with only one person. I bet it is not one in a million.
Reply
Wednesday 01 July
By Barb Richards
When I met my soulmate, we were much older than one would expect beginning lovers to be. In fact I discovered we were too old to have sex the old "missionary position" way. At 76 he couldn't get it up and 10 years younger I didn't think pain was very enjoyable. But I was not adverse to giving him a thorough manual fondling and a blow-job and he quickly learned to lick the old honey jar. That was the extent of "sex" but how we loved and enjoyed bringing our partner to orgasim for the last 6 years.
Reply
Wednesday 01 July
By jane
lol but most of the time.. the woman is not brought to orgasm...
sex is intercourse... everything else is "outercourse"
Reply
Wednesday 01 July
By Melissa
I disagree. Sex requires penetration by a male's member, unless you're a lesbian, and that's when the lines get blurred. The rest is "fooling around." Oral is just as, if not more intimate, but it's not sex.
Reply
Sunday 16 August
By JW RadCliffe
Umm, hello! isn't sticking a man's male member in your mouth penetration? He's not penetrating your Hoo Hoo, however, I would certainly count it as penetration. The same goes for anal penetration. I understand many girls believe they can do everything else and still be considered a virgin. OK, so you're a virgin but you're still a slut. Get over yourselves!
Women need to be more open about sex, sexual acts, what we like sexually, how many partners we've really had and why we are equally entitled to enjoy sex. Experimentation isn't only for men. Society doesn't chastise a man for having multiple partners. If a woman has multiple partners, why is she a slut?
It's time to shut men up! The truth is, if we don't want to give it to you...you're SOL, period. Men call us sluts to demoralize our sense of shelf worth. It's about control. Guess what guys. You don't control us... Women are getting stronger, have better careers and realizing they can support a family by themselves.
There's no need to take care of a man like he's a child any longer. Nobody does my laundry, picks up after me, pays my bill on time. Why should I be doing it for a man? Bottom line, men need to grow up, and accept the fact most women love sex. If you're not getting her off...somebody else is...
Wednesday 01 July
By Mosia
Its called oral sex...notice the S-E-X! And mutual masturbation is most definitely sex as well.
Reply
Wednesday 01 July
By Kate
Fellation & cunnilingus are acceptable words for the same act and do not have the word sex in it. So I think there has to be more to defining something as sex other than what you choose to call it.
Thursday 02 July
By Kevin
Don't you dummies here believe the second worst president in history, behind the current pres, on oral sex not being sex!
As Mosia says: ts called oral sex...notice the S-E-X! And mutual masturbation is most definitely sex as well.
Reply
Wednesday 01 July
By Kate
Fellatio & cunnilingus are acceptable words for the same act and do
not have the word sex in it. So I think there has to be more to
defining something as sex other than what you choose to call it. In my opinion sex is intercourse. But my mom thinks ( I asked her opinion) sex is short for sexual and that can include anything that is sexual in nature.
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Thursday 02 July
By Melanie
I consider myself a virgin, despite having performed and received oral sex. I suppose it really depends on the person.
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Thursday 02 July
By RedRock
Melanie, you are and will remain a virgin until your hymen is broken, given or receiving oral sex has nothing to do with that. However the use of some sex toys could quickly change your status.
Sunday 23 August
By Me
Right? I do too.
Thursday 02 July
By Cori
Isn't a "virgin" a "virgin" if she has not had sexual intercourse?
Reply
Friday 24 July
By Annabelle
Sex is short for "sexual." If you engage in ANY sexual activity with another person, you are NOT still a virgin. Virgins remain pure. Giving oral sex or masturbating, is NOT pure. Don't fool yourselves. A girl who hasn't engaged in sexual activity but loses her hymen through some other circumstance doesn't lose the badge of virginity. She's still a virgin. Sluts can still have hymens. Remaining a virgin in light of all of societal's pressure to be a whore (either man or woman) is something to be proud of. Only the weak put down remaining a virgin. And if you "touch" other people when you're married, it's infidelity. Clinton's Dictionary of Sex is not a good excuse to make yourself feel better about your own sleazy behaviors.