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During the winter before my wedding, I was on assignment in Sicily, where I 
met Diego, a photojournalist with black hair, a scruffy beard, and warm brown eyes that could liquefy concrete. He was my guide in Palermo, driving me around the city on his motorcycle. On my last day, as we stood in a bombed-out cathedral -- him talking about World War II, me trying to focus on his words -- he started inching closer. Another inch. Then a fraction more, and he was in my personal space. The slightest gesture from me would have been an invitation. I froze. I was madly in love with my fiancee, so what the hell was I doing? The desire to cheat is hardly a new emotion for me. In fact, I can fairly say that if you've dated me, there's a pretty good chance I was unfaithful. (I'm really sorry!) You might even call me a natural-born cheater -- and I think I get it from my father.
Are dads to blame for cheating? Read more on the next page.
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Thursday 11 June
By janet
I have often wondered what actually has happened to our country. I guess the same thing that has happened to other countries that have failed. Sick sex. The ones that get blamed are usually the innocent ones, so don't give up your life if you are healthy and restrain yourself from sick sex. Hitler is a good example. He was so sick, he had to blame the whole world and to perpetuate his own sin, he had to get rid of the innocent. I think it bears noting that if this country doesn't grow up and stop "falling in love" at every bend in the road, everyone will pay the price of a bad conscience. People who sleep around know they are wrong and believe me, at first if their conscience does bother them, they will continue in their rebellious actions looking for "love". After low self esteem takes over, the conscience dies and there are no more boundaries and we all pay as a nation. The old fashioned people are always laughed at by the people that indulge in sick behavior. Grow up America. Keep your pants on until you do. You will be worth more in the long run. I don't want anyone telling me anything if they have no morals.
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Thursday 11 June
By john preston
People who try to live their sex-lives as amorally as dogs do eventually realize through the inevitable failure of their personal life that it does not work. We have become a sex-saturated society... a good indicator of just how narcisitc, shallow, and imature those who mold our culture truly are.
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Thursday 11 June
By Ed
She blames her father for her cheating Girls will be girls its always the mans falt never hers
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Thursday 11 June
By April
Ed..
She did not blame her father. and to everyone.. THE QUESTIONS WAS RAISED ARE YOUR PREDESPOSED TO CHEAT. She explained why she is asking this questions, because her father had cheated, is that the reason she did it. But some of her history was not cheating it was overlapping how many people (especially when you were younger) went out with a guy/girl and then started liking someone else and started dating them BEFORE you told the first person??? She has not cheated on her husband (was fiance) She said she was tempted.. Will their marriage survive probably not, because she is telling him everytime she is tempted. Is it because her history she feels she needs to tell her Husband?? I do believe that is stupid because that will make him feel less of a man and not wanted by her.. I DO BELIEVE THE MAIN QUESTION IN THE STORY WAS IS IT PREDESPOSED whether then she is blaming someone else. She admitted what she has done.. It is so funny the double standard though.. Women are bitches, sluts, cunts, whores, etc.. but men are studs and get pats on the back from their buddies when they do it.. Physical cheating is not the only way either.. WHEN YOU ARE IN THAT CHAT ROOM FLIRTING WITH SOMEONE AND MAKING SEXUAL INNUEDOS THAT IS A FORM OF CHEATING.. Remember that everyone..
Thursday 11 June
By SHWETANK SHUKLA
I THINK LOVE CAN BE BEST DESCRIBED BY THE PERSON WHO HAS EXPERIENCED WQT IT IS
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Thursday 11 June
By Ron Point
Well, that's just great. Now we'll see a whole generation of women cheaters claiming they "just can't help themselves". This will follow the "I'm not responsible because I was a victim as a child" excuse that is currently going around. When are people going to stop making excuses, take responsibility for their actions, and remove the deviant conduct from their lives.
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Thursday 11 June
By Dave
It is all about conquest, control, and power with men and women who cheat and step out emotionally or physically on their mate. Believe me, once you cheat, other men will know about it, brag, and boast about the conquest. It takes discipline and self control to stay faithfull. The same type of discipline that is required for boot camp, college, the martial arts, and working out. Values today are undfer valued, downplayed and laughed at. But, with the influx of STDS, aids, cervical cancer, and HPV; partners are not safe.
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Thursday 11 June
By Mike
I am tired of the double standard in spociety that says: "men are basically all cheaters", and when a woman cheats: "there is something she needed because the relationship was askew". It is an act of hatred and abuse towards your loved one. Gender does not give you an excuse, nor does your level of maturity. Those "best friends" of women who support them when they cheat are also partners in the wrongdoing. This isn't friendship at all, but a form of group violence.
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Thursday 11 June
By Shut up!
y'all are only saying that because your pathetic losers who get cheated on. shes not a slut so shut the f up. :)
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Thursday 11 June
By Royal
Of course she is a slut ....If technique were really the issue then there would be no cheating because everyone has the tools to accomplish that....it all comes down to ego, self centeredness and and lack of impulse control
Thursday 11 June
By Jean
How sad that you think that way, it could only mean that the word slut or whore insults you personally. Are you one of those that destroyed a family? Are you to 50% responsible for what is said as the forcing of raping of another's Holy Spirit?
Are you in anyway responsible for the sleepless nights, pure torture of her heart and grief of her spirt. of a wife who loves her husband still. I think you should re think what you are saying, for you never know what life will throw your way. Unless you plan on not ever having a meaningful relationship, you might find yourself as a wife and mother someday and if this happens to you I promise you will think back on your owns words.
Thursday 11 June
By MIKE
WHY DONT YOU JUST SHUVE A KNIFE UP YOUR ASS EVERYTIME, U FEEL LIKE U NEED TO CHEET................
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Thursday 11 June
By R
Funny how all of these comments by men call the woman a "slut." If the same article was about a man, that wouldn't have been said. And for all the hateful men out there, it's much easier to call a woman a "slut" or piece of scum then turn inwards and examine yourself. Maybe it was your crappy attitudes towards women that made them want someone who tried a little harder. Or maybe you just all suck in bed, and she found someone better. Don't be bitter.
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Thursday 11 June
By Steve
Yeah these men she is with try harder until about six seconds after they are done with this whore. These type of women are great for men looking for something quick and easy. As far as sucking in bed, maybe if women did that a little more men would stay interested.
Thursday 11 June
By Chris Krezel Jr
Shes A slut. Straight out scum of the earth. If you feel the need to cheat then dont be in a relationship. You People that cheat Hurt People like me that are only tryin to Find that special someone. Honestly I wish yous would die. Your a Disease To this race. And Since I'm a Guy that means alot. I dont cheat. I think its the worst thing you could do to someone that loves you. so where the ladies that don't cheat. get at me on myspace. hahahahah E-mail Is Chris_krezel2005@yahoo.com
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Thursday 11 June
By Bill
God, she's a journalist. Like ALL of liberalism, cheating is just
taking the easy way out and then blaming someone else. Grow a backbone and stick with what you agree to.
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Thursday 11 June
By James Little
This old age behavior of cheating has to stop in this age of AIDS if we want to survival. Ever hear of Darwins servival of the fitest? Smart will not die out in this case. I may not make it though LOL I can't even spell servival
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Thursday 11 June
By Kelley McCabe Ruff
What an awesome article! I applaud the author for looking at an inconvenient truth and responding to it with wisdom.
We all have stories. The story could be, "My father was a wanderer and a cheat - and so am I" and acted out that way. Instead the Danielle looks at her desires and says, "Gee, I wonder if that's because I'm looking to fill in the gaps for the love I didn't get as a child?" And, realizing that's impossible, and whatever other reasons Danielle has for wanting to be faithful to her husband, she works with her desires with a great deal of honesty and integrity... and grows in the process (my guess is her husband grows, too). Kudos to you and your husband, Danielle! Keep up the good work...
What Danielle seems to already know is that in every moment we can decide to make a different choice… different from our past choices and different from the choices our parents made. We’re not doomed to a certain fate – even if there IS an infidelity gene. (Maybe Danielle and Michael, the M.D., would be interested in reading Jeff Dusek’s research on how our state of mind/body can effect genomic expression…)
Every comment here is a “story” and a reflection of the commentator’s own experiences and fears. The rest of us could take a play from Danielle’s playbook and look at our own views, judgments and desires with honesty and integrity.
That’s MY story and I’m sticking to it… :=)
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Thursday 11 June
By harper
to "wrong again john" - just because he agrees with the article doesn't mean him, myself or the author of the article are bad people or "peices of shit." everyone is different and has different relationships and you have no right to judge them.
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Thursday 11 June
By Karli
Why do u find it so hard to keep monogamy in your relationship? Well, it's not your fault. Your genes don't have it encoded. Or have you seen monogamous apes?
Monogamy is so rare in the animal world that only 3-5 % of the mammals are known to form lifelong pair bonds, like beavers, otters, jackals, foxes, some bats and a few dwarf deer and antelopes.
In fact, strict monogamy is almost inexistent, as creatures that do pair for life, occasionally have flings on the side and some, like the wolf, do not mourn too much a death or a no longer sexually performing partner.
Staying faithful is extremely hard for animals, as the males are programmed to spread their genes and females to get the best genes from the best males for their young.
.....So in fact....we are not born as a species to be with one and only one mate. Especially not the males. Its more of a moral thing now a days then anything. That and well, if you want to catch a disease or not. Otherwise, In my personal opinion it is in are DNA. **Animal instinct baby**
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