By now you may have heard of Kari Ferrell, the New York administrative assistant who seemed like an average 22-year-old hipster ... until it was discovered that she's a pathological liar on the run from the law.
But Ferrell isn't the first person to make the news for whipping up whoppers, and she won't be the last. But why do liars start spinning yarns in the first place?
Everything But the Truth
Kari's hardly the first con. Esther Elizabeth Reed, for example, maneuvered her way into Ivy League schools and avoided capture for the better part of a decade. In France, Frédéric Bourdin, 30, was able to fool people in more than a dozen countries into thinking he was an abused teenager.
Even though they have to be fairly intelligent and cunning to lie, psychologist Doris Jeanette of the Center for New Psychology in Philadelphia says pathological liars do what they do because they are "massively insecure." They don't think they're good enough on their own, so they formulate fibs to feel better.
"Most liars will lie about anything, even when it is not important and it does not matter," Dr. Jeanette said. "They just say anything because there is no connection with their emotional self."
Are they crazy or calculating? Click here for more.Insane in the Brain?
That emotional disconnect allows liars to believe their own lies. And that helps them convince others of their untruths.
Michelle from New York, for example, was taken in by a gal pal who curried sympathy with talk of a rough childhood.
"Knowing she had a tough upbringing, I didn't mind grabbing the bill or paying for cabs. I was even entertained by the stories of how she lived in Rome when she modeled for Ford Modeling Agency, that her father was from Rio de Janeiro or that her roommate stole $1,000 in cash from her bedroom," Michelle admits.
Michelle even let it slide when she thought the friend had stolen cash from her. But when she discovered that some of their mutual acquaintances had experienced similar behavior, Michelle confronted the woman.
Liar, Liar, Pants on Fire
The scary part is there seems to be no way to predict who or what will turn someone into a liar.
"I have known poor people who were severely physically traumatized in early childhood who lied and well-educated people who were emotionally traumatized who lied," Dr. Jeanette says. "I have known many who were abused and did not lie, so no, I cannot say from my clinical experience there is a common trauma for liars."
But biology is another story. Scientists at the University of Southern California found that truth twisters have more "white" matter in their brains and less "gray" matter. In English, that means they are more verbal and have less of a moral compass than normal people, which makes faking it a piece of cake after a while.
All in the Family -- or Not
Michelle eventually cut ties with her lying friend. For others, it's not so easy. Beth from North Carolina says her brother has lied about working for a major league baseball team, spying for the government and producing TV shows. She and her sisters haven't spoken to him in two years.
"We say about him, 'If he's talking, he's lying.' He's been that way ever since he could talk and also has a pretty extensive arrest record. However, his ability to con people has prevented him from serving any real time in jail."
Shirley from Pennsylvania says even though her sister-in-law is attractive, intelligent and personable, she lies compulsively. She's fibbed about her occupations and makes up illnesses.
"She will stare right at you and tell you the most fabulous, ridiculous lie, and it's almost like she is daring you to tell her she's lying ... I tried to organize a family intervention, but no one wanted to challenge her." Shirley eventually confronted her sister-in-law on her own and asked her to get help. The two haven't spoken since.
Tell us: Do you know someone who lies constantly? Do you ever call them out on their behavior?













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Tuesday 21 April
By bob
Is that a mannequin?
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Tuesday 21 April
By Chantelle
I worked with a person for 2 years that was a compulsive liar. It was a very frustrating experience that I hope to never repeat. Each day was something different be it complex or simple. She was emotional, irrational, and clearly had a poor self esteem. Here are some gem's
-She was raped on the train by 6 native guys and still came into work the next day.
-She had throat cancer.
-She's been in the army and stabbed a guy who attacked her.
-Engaged, not once, but 4 times. You never saw a picture, he always lived some where else, and she always wore the same emerald ring.
-She was pregnant. It actually reached the point where I feared she'd be one of those women who steal babies.
-My favourite little lie was when she came to work with crimped hair. I commented on it saying her hair looked good crimped. At which she decided to swear up and down that she was born with curly hair and straightens every day. I said I didn't believe her and that I took cosmetology and could tell it was crimped.
These lies always died out once people lost interest so I never gave her any attention. She learned quite quickly to avoid the people who didn't believe her and pray on those that either humored her or were new enough not to know her history.
Underneath it all you saw this person so consumed by the want to liked, thought of as interesting, and belong that it was pathetic. It's ironic how her lies to attract people only made you avoid her more.
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Friday 24 April
By Kristina
I do believe my older sister is a pathological liar.
For as long as I can remember, she has made up stories and lied about things that were just unnecessary.
At work a couple years ago she would get people to lend her money by telling them that she was the breadwinner of our house and that my parents were sick and dying and deformed from head to toe with tumors. She told them we had no money for food.
She will also lie to you about little meaningless things, like if I ask her if she ate the last slice of pizza she will say "no". Like WTF? Why does she feel the need to lie even about little shit?
We are all sick of her lies and don't believe a word that comes out of her mouth, but we don't confront her about it. If we know she is clearly lying to our face we just go along with it and say something like "Yeah...uh huh...."
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Saturday 25 April
By Kryssy
I'm a pathological liar... but I try super hard not to be. I do believe that it's because of insecurity, you feel like you're not interesting and sometimes once you start you can't stop. I lie to my friends, family, professors and parents all the time and I always kick myself later for doing it. So, I know it's hard to sympathize with a pathological liar but maybe if you told her that she's awesome just the way she is , without the crazy stories and "life" she would believe it too.
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Saturday 02 May
By Samara
I'm a liar too. I lie about stupid things. I've convinced people I had a heroin addiction, and even believe it myself when I KNOW it wasn't true. It's a sickness. I've started by not lying about little things. It's helpful.
Saturday 02 May
By Paul
I don't believe you. LOL
Wednesday 13 May
By JenB
I'm a freelance journalist doing a story on this topic. I'd love to interview you briefly about your experiences. Could you email me so we can talk? Victlynne@aol.com
Saturday 15 August
By Susie
Liar!
Friday 24 April
By Beachy
I had the pleasure of marrying a patho which I did not discover until after we were married. He wanted to feel like a big shot so he would drive to work in his Dad's truck and tell people it was his or bigger things like introducing me to friends of his (girls) that I would get to know and often like only to find out later he had affairs with them prior to me meeting them. It got so bad that random people would call the house yelling that he owed them a $1000 and they wanted to know where their money was. Of course, I usually had no clue what they were talking about. He was infamous for starting tile jobs getting paid all of the money before he finished and either walking away from it all together or doing a shoddy job just to be done. So, when I confronted him with the idea that he was an impulsive liar and needed help because our marriage was suffering his answer was "What are you talking about? What problem?" I asked him so you don't think that you lie to people often... No, no I don't! So, I said well I need to ask for a divorce because we can't work on something that you don't acknowledge even exists and we did. I seem to attract the same kind of guy because my last relationship was an absolute nightmare from the get go the good thing is I am seeing the red flags sooner and ending them shortly after I can see there is no hope for a healthy relationship. This guy was even 9 years older than me but from day one he accused me of cheating on him on a daily basis this went on for a year and a half and the whole time it was really his own guilt for what he was doing but he would redirect it at me. I finally said enough and I know in my heart that I deserve much better.
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Sunday 26 April
By k8
My old boss was a compulsive liar, with little or no inhibitions in the lying department. I told her I had served four years in the army, a week later her husband approached me, and asked if it was true that I had been a spy and was secretly dropped into dangerous jungle missions. Umm... I had a desk job. I once missed a couple of weeks of work for a kidney stone, when I returned to work, my coworkers were shocked. How could I recover from a kidney transplant so quickly? She was ridiculous, I only lasted there for 3 months.
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Monday 27 April
By Sarah
Okay. I dislike pathological liars with a GREAT GREAT passion. After reading this, it helps out ALOT! Because I know several people that are CONSTANTLY lying, about the STUPiDEST little things; and about anything and everything in every second of their lifes!
Take for example this girl that called me one time from her [[HOUSE PHONE]]. She starts a conversation with me, asking me what I'm doing and where I'm at. So, i'm like "oh nothing, im sittin at my house being bored." And she goes, "oh, I'm at my friends house with my boyfriend."
OMG! I didnt call her out on her lie, but still, the fact that she called from her HOUSE phone, and I KNOW she didnt have a boyfriend? Wow, its crazy. And one time she even ACTED like some guy was there kissing on her! Wat the heck? Its crazy.
I do not like these pathological liars. "/
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Monday 27 April
By Someone
We had a friend who calimed to have a contractor's license and a job history that included building a hospital. I check him out online and he had never even applied for a license in any specialty in any of the states he lived in. We finally ahd a joke: " How do you tell if _____ is lying? His lips are moving." He once tried to convince me that there are 3 hours between 2:20 pm and 3:40. Yeah, right!
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Saturday 02 May
By Jeff
I am a pathalogical liar. My mother turned me into one. Our house was such a disaster area. My grand parents died, all their junk became her junk. It was like living in a submarine. The house on the outside looked great.
It was this that caused me to lie and lie and lie. Now I'm 28 and still lying about things. I have a great memory, so I can remember everything that I've ever lied about.
Also its only SOME people that I think that I need to lie to. Like the people that are hard to read I think that I need to lie to, just to get a reaction out of them.
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Tuesday 28 April
By yes
can you push your lies on to someone else to make them look like your the crazy one? after 23 years of marriage i find out he took me off some of the acounts who knows what else. and now because of all the mysterious illnesses i have suffered and on so much meds i keep hearing your mistaking your meds are afecting your jugment. not form the dr.s either. so i stay in the house all alone and in the yard and not talk to anyone, iguess he won. liers hurt people
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Tuesday 26 May
By Iron Cage
Dear Yes,
Please, please get out of that marriage. I know it will be hard, probably finacially and emotionally. Start going through the emotional separation process now. You are married to a man who manipulates and controls you. He tells you things and you cannot prove that what he tells you isn't true, but you know that he is not being truthful. His actions should show this. I am a Registered Nurse, I have worked in psych, this is my strongest interest, the human mind. I know what you are going through because I have been in a marriage like yours, and gone through the painful process of getting out. Life is so much better! You would probably be able to not take so many meds, because you are under a great deal of stress. DO talk to your doctor. Please. He/she can refer you to someone that can help you with this process.
Good luck and God Bless.
Tuesday 19 May
By Tina
Please get yourself some help. You do not deserve or need to submit to this form of emotional abuse.
Tuesday 26 May
By IronCage
BTW, I had two very young children, had no education, no job experience to speak of when I got out of that marriage. I went back to school while raising my children, dealt with a psychotic ex who stalked and threatened my life (no stalking laws at that time) I even took them to class with me on occassion when absolutely neccessary. So, I didn't become an RN until after my divorce. Yes, it was tough, but you know, those years of being a single mom raising my children and going back to school were some of the best in my life, I learned I could do ANYTHING I chose to do! I learned to fix things that were broken, do the basic maintainance on my car and much more. It's great to be free of that oppression. Please get out of that marriage, and don't let him talk you back into it. That's what guys like that do. They say they're sorry and they're going to change, but they don't. You do not need all that stress in your life. It takes a hard toll on your life both mentally and physically over the years.
Wednesday 29 April
By Expensive lesson
I was madly in love with the perfect guy. Rocked my world if you know what I'm saying and planned to be married in Hawaii on my birthday with his family there with us. Two weeks before the wedding I found out that not only was he cheating with anyone, anytime, he had also opened accounts online with my information and had charged up a bunch of bills and by the time I found out they were three months late!!!! On top of breaking my heart he's also destroyed my credit. He talked me into buying a timeshare in Vegas (Oh baby, I'll pay for it. Yah right) Now I have to sell my house because he skipped out on paying and I owe so much that the INTEREST is $350 a month. He wouldn't leave when I tried to kick him out and I had to give him an eviction notice. Then two weeks later he GETS A JOB WHERE I WORK!!!!!!!Made my life a living hell. He finally got himself fired and then got a job a block away from my house working the graveyard shift. Interesting that someone broke the railing by my bedroom window in the middle of the night. Also an attempt was made to steal my E-Bay account. I finally got a police report and hopefully this nightmare will end. My point is that I should have seen it coming because I would catch him lying to his mom on the phone over stupid little things and some of the stories he told (Like meeting Van Halen) just got bigger every time he told them. Still, it is terrifying to realize that somebody so close to you could have systematically taken advantage of you FOR YEARS. I don't consider myself a stupid person. I'm accomplished in my career and loved by my family and have many friends. I think it is a combination of mental illness and PURE EVIL that makes a human being prey like a leach on the kindness of others. My goal is to not let it change me from being kindhearted and generous because I like that about myself. Thank God I found out BEFORE I married him :)
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Wednesday 29 April
By ~J.S
In my college Biology class, I became somewhat friends with a girl who I sat next to. We would chat before and after class and I thought she was a very nice girl. We then took another class together and after about 1 week of class, she pretty much just stopped coming to class. I would always email her to check up on her and such....and she would tell me things like "today isn't a good day, my car was totalled, my sister ran away from home and I'm sick!" I woudl think that she was sincere and feel bad for her...i would copy my notes and give them to her. As weeks went on, she probably came to class 4 out of 15 times. She even missed the first exam because she said her Grandma died. I am not even sure I believe her anymore....
Her excuses included: "My Grandma is in the hospital dying", "I have the worst flu I've had in years", "I totalled my car, my neck is killing me, I went to the doctor instead of class" (then later told me her husband wrecked the car!), "My husband lost his job AND had a seizure" , "I'm having a panic attack", "My husband had a court appeal".....then the best one of all. I ask her if shes coming to one of our last classes and she says "Not feeling motivated"(at 11:32am)...then at 12:30, She says her husband went to the dentist to have a sore tooth looked at, and ended up having his wisdom teeth taken out right there on the spot without any anesthetic and no pain medication to take home, because noone was there to drive him home. Its like she sat at home just thiking up good excuses she hadn't yet used to not come to class....She couldn't leave her husband at home by himself for 2 hours to come to class, but she ended up going out to dinner later without him.
I guess I'm just fed up with the stories, even though they are highly entertaining.....you're 26 years old, just say "fuck it, I don't feel like going".....you don't have to scheme up elaborate tales to get out of class! :)
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Wednesday 29 April
By judy
What is the difference between a pathological liar and a sociopath? I am sure I know someone who is one or both. Any help?
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