A recent AOL Personals story on the right time to go all the way with a new partner got us talking with our friends about how we know a guy's sex-worthy. "I have to know a guy wants to be serious with me before I sleep with him," says Alicia, 24. "When he talks about things we can do in the future and acknowledges that he doesn't want to be with anyone else, I finally feel comfortable around him. It's a turn-on, and that usually leads to sex!"
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10 Supposed Aphrodisiacs
Avocado Avocado trees were called Ahuacuati, or "testicle tree," by the Aztecs. And they were forbidden by Catholic priests for their sex appeal (no joke).
ulterior epicure, Flickr
Chocolate The Aztecs worshipped this treat for its supposed aphrodisiac properties. While that's not scientifically proven, it does affect serotonin and the circulatory system. When both of those are kickin', it's definitely a lot easier to get in the mood.
karenmcallister, Flickr
Asparagus On top of making your pee smell funny, these phallic-shaped veggies are rich in Vitamin E, which is essential to a healthy sex drive and to producing sex hormones.
geishaboy500, Flickr
Cinnamon Buns Cinnamon buns are the number-one smell that turns guys on, according to research from the Smell and Taste Treatment and Research Foundation in Chicago.
zebble, Flickr
Eggs Eggs are a symbol of fertility (duh) dating back to ancient Greece and the Indian Kama Sutra. Choose eggs that are naturally fertilized -- many factory-laid eggs are not produced with an actual rooster, resulting in eggs with less hormones. A study showed that men who ate naturally fertilized eggs showed increased libido, sexual activity and stamina.
aubergene, Flickr
Epimedium grandiflorum This plant is known by many as Horny Goat Weed for its er, happy effect on goats. It's popular in Chinese medicine and has been around for over 2000 years. It's frequently found in pill form and is considered to be safe.
halle, Flickr
Spanish Fly The most famous of aphrodisiacs is made up of crushed beetles and more than a little is believed to be fatal.
Muchaxo, Flickr
Ginseng Thought to posses "aphrodisiac properties," Ginseng is also a popular Chinese medicine. It also translates as "man root." So maybe that explains it.
GeekySpaz, Flickr
Spicy Stuff Chilies and peppers are known to pep up the sex drive, so if your guy can handle the heat, bring it into the kitchen. Chili peppers can stimulate the nervous system and pump up the drive in girls and guys alike.
adactio, Flickr
Turkey If you thought you felt a little tingle on Turkey Day, you were probably not alone. Turkey is often blamed for making us sleepy, but it turns out it is the same element that causes drowsiness, tryptophan, that's actually sending us to bed for a different reason.
Country Living
While there are no set-in-stone, sex-for-the-first-time timing rules, there are plenty of things that can turn the tide for women. For some humor plays a huge role, as does having a mental connection with the person.
With the third-date-rule played out, we think getting to know someone on a more-than-physical level is the way to go if you're looking for more than a one-night stand. Whether the magic happens on the second date or the 20th, if the chemistry and connection are right we say go for it!
Tell us: What signs do you look for in a new relationship when deciding whether to jump in the sack? What's your make-it-or-break-it factor?Ten Famous Sex Myths, Debunked
Women only like bad boys and have to be cajoled into being in the mood, right? Ha! We consulted with Barbara Keesling, PhD, author of "The Good Girl's Guide to Bad Girl Sex" and got the truth about 10 other crazy-pants sex myths.
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Myth: Women have to be in a relationship to enjoy sex.
The Truth: Your orgasm potential has nothing to do with whether you're single or committed. Having great sex has to do with physical sensations, not your status. What's more, many women report having stronger orgasms when they masturbate than they do with a partner.
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Myth: Women don't (and shouldn't!) masturbate as often as guys.
The Truth: Ha! There is absolutely no rule as to how much you should get yourself off. Do it is much as you'd like. In fact, the more you do it, the more you'll understand what it takes to reach climax and that can help you guide your guy when you're in bed together.
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Myth: Vaginal orgasms feel better than clitoral orgasms.
The Truth: There is no such thing as a better orgasm -- they're all pretty fantastic. They definitely feel different because they originate in different spots. Try experimenting and achieving the various types -- clitoral, vaginal, g-spot -- to see which you prefer.
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Myth: A woman should be able to orgasm during intercourse.
The Truth: Putting that kind of pressure on yourself may prevent you from having an orgasm at all. A lot of women are unable to reach their peak through straight penetration. Most need clitoral stimulation as well. So don't feel bad touching yourself, having your partner touch you, or even using a vibrator while he thrusts.
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Myth: Women don't get turned on by porn.
The Truth: There's no hard rule on this one. Some chicks like naughty flicks, others don't. If porn doesn't do the trick for you, try erotic literature. Lots of women prefer it because it allows them to use their imagination when picturing what's going on.
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Myth: Guys love lingerie.
The Truth: Many men just find lingerie complicated. Think about it, all those snaps and ribbons and straps are confusing and a pain in the ass to get off of you when he wants to get some. Most guys will tell you they much prefer a woman naked.
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Myth: If you're good in bed, you should be able to please anyone.
The Truth: Some people have instant in-bed chemistry, others have to work on it. That means, you could sleep with 10 guys and they would all have a different opinion of your skills. (And you of theirs!) Communication is key to being able to have good sex with someone. Tell him what you like and don't like, and ask him to do the same. If you're too shy to say it, show him by guiding his hands.
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Myth: Men prefer women who pursue them sexually.
The Truth: Evolution tells us the exact opposite. Most men like to feel like they've worked for a women's attention. However, that doesn't mean that you have to sit in the corner and wait for a man to approach you. Go ahead and signal to a guy that you're interested by flirting. Just avoid things like grabbing his crotch in a crowded bar.
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Myth: Happy couples always have good sex.
The Truth: No one always hits a homer in the bedroom. You could be in the best relationship and have an off night if one of you isn't feeling well or is stressed. If you are always having bad sex, it may be a bigger problem. If this is the case, discuss what you both need in bed to enjoy yourselves more
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Comments:
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Tuesday 07 April
By misanthropegirl
The sad but true truth is that the more we like a guy, the longer we're going to wait to sleep with him. I'll sleep with a guy I don't like very much on the first date, but if I like you, I'm playing hard to get!
Reply
Wednesday 08 April
By Damien Thorne
I hate to be the one to break the news to you. It doesnt make a bit of difference how long you make a guy wait. We don't really know if you are a keeper until AFTER we have sex with you. So if you make a guy wait too long it becomes a challenge for him and it becomes about the conquest and less about you. I laugh when women think making a guy wait is going to make him think of her in a much better light. Actually the making a guy wait is more for your own feelings than a guys. We are either into you or not. If we are really into you we will not leave because you slept with us the first date, week or month. Its all about chemistry and not some dumb timetable.
Tuesday 07 April
By snuffalupagus
Then your dad must not have liked me very much at all!
Reply
Tuesday 07 April
By Pimento06
misanthropegirl--- I completely agree with you. I am the same way!
Reply
Thursday 09 April
By mtm206
to tell you the truth it does not matter if you make us wait or not. this i going to sound old but sex is better when both partners are ready. rather it is 1st date or 10th
Reply
Thursday 09 April
By kathy
Gosh, what has America come to. What happened to waiting until you were married? The way that God planned it. One man....one woman. No wonder this society is going to hell in a hand basket. Geez
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Thursday 09 April
By Frank
Wow. Using an outdated system of beliefs is never a good way to tell when you are ready for a sexual relationship.
What if you wait til marriage, and get stuck with someone who is lousy in bed?
No thanks!
Sunday 06 December
By amy
really? the only reason to wait is disease. sex is just a way to show affection. its not some holy union. really fucking is just what people do.
Thursday 09 April
By Veronica
Kathy.. I'm sorry to burst your little bubble but i think that ship sailed a long long long time ago. i know kids as young as 12 years old already having sex. I honestly can say MAJORITY of people don't wait till marriage anymore.
Reply
Thursday 09 April
By ali
the other thing is there's the stereotype that everyone is doing it and that its bad to wait, or at least that's what my high school friends made it out to be when i got to college i realized not everyone is having sex but a lot of people are. i'm the type of person that has to have an emotional connection with someone before being that intimate and i was lucky in that i just knew when the right time for me was with a guy. it also depends on what you're looking out of a relationship, either long-term or short-term, that could have an effect on what you decide.
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Thursday 09 April
By kathy
Oh, Veronica. I realize that. But, it still doesn't make it right. I am 52 years old and have 5 kids. All I can do is teach them right from wrong as I was taught from the Bible. The decision is theirs, but if they decide to, it still doesn't make it right.
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Tuesday 21 April
By David
sorry to wreck your fantasy but the Bible never says premarital sex is wrong. Read Leviticus all you want and you just won't find it. In Biblical times and in many cultures till modern times peole had sex after betrothal so that if she didn't get pregnant the groom got the bride price back returned her to her father and could search for a fertile wife. This is why the gospel of Mathew makes such a case that Joseph did not sleep with Mary before Jesus was concieved.
In Biblical times only married prople could commit adultery. Single folks not mentioned.
In a study ongoing since 1950, the Guttmacher institute has found that >75% of all married couples had sex before the ceremony. I was one of the rare exceptions in 1959.
Thursday 09 April
By Rachel
Kathy - Just because it's you're believe doesn't mean its right or wrong. What's right to one person may be wrong to you and vice versa. I'm a health teacher and thats the number 1 thing i don't do to my students - preach.
Reply
Thursday 09 April
By Uknowhat
It doesn't matter how long you make a person wait for sex. I made a guy wait for 3 1/2mnts and the bottom line was I didn't know he was a crazy stalker til afterwards. It's all up to the comforrt level. Some people comfort level for sex is @ hello others til they get married(not happening here). My comfort level depends on the person im dating @ the time. Sometime sex is just that sex nothing more nothing less. And if some like and lust is thrown in there then its all the better. You're not goin to know that person you're w/ screwing is a nut til the peanut butter hits the fan.
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Thursday 09 April
By Devynn
what's this "dating" thing that you speak of? :p alot of the problems young ppl are having with sex is harmonal. the guys wants to get in as many girls as possible. the women want a deeper connection, but sleep with him anyways b/c they think it'll make him stay/like them better or something. i used to try to establish some kind of connection with guys. it blew up in my face b/c the guys weren't ready for a relationship. when a man is ready, he's ready and you'll know it. that's what drew me to my husband. we both wanted the same things. which just made me want him more physically. and so far, it's been working pretty good. i think my pregnancy is proof of that. :p
and for the record, if BOTH ppl wait til marriage to have sex, how the hell will they know they're having "bad" sex? if something causes the marriage to dissolve or one person dies, then i can see your point in their next relationship. but NOT before. either way, sex gets better as you get older. b/c you know what you're doing, you know what you like and you know how to get to the Big O. if you gotta teach someone then so be it. that's fun, too! :) in my case, we bot have over active imaginations so we come to each other to try new things. this pregnancy thing is killing alot of things, tho. but i think things will get better.......
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Thursday 09 April
By Andy
Everyone besides Kathy is a really huge Whore. No "ship" of abstinence went sailing. In fact, I'll pull out my V-Card right here and show you all. And I'm a damn good looking guy. I hold things like this sacred, and when I'm married, it will be great. Everyone of my friends lost it, and most of them are single fathers and hate it... I haven't made that mistake yet, and won't. So all you all are just regretting what you did and say things like "oh well it's okay - since I did it" - Hell no. I'm a man, and I'm manning up.
Problem with opinions is that yours' are all wrong.
myspace.com/andycyphert
myspace.com/andycypherttrio
getroadworn.com/andycypherttrio
PEACE!
Reply
Thursday 09 April
By Devynn
you know what andy, you're the one that's wrong. why? b/c you're calling ppl's OPINIONS wrong. there is NOTHING wrong about opinions. we may not like that ppl have opinions that are different from our's, but it doesn't make them wrong. you can be a virgin all you want. you can marry one. but you NEVER know that your spouse will divorce you. you NEVER know that they may die. you NEVER know whether or not you'll become a single parent. there are only TWO certanities in life: death and taxes. never say never, dude. sometimes being cocky and putting that cockiness out there for the world to see, comes back to bite you. HARD. it's the universe's way of teaching you to be a lil more humble. you could stand to learn the lesson......
Sunday 06 December
By amy
waiting is a good idea, especially when you are still forming your sexual identity. could you imagine banging a girl before realizing you really are into men? well, that's my story. it would be easier to have waited and not done dudes before realizing i was waaay into girls. definitely wish i had known I was a huge lesbian before. Maybe you'll have the benefit i never had.
Saturday 11 April
By dawnmare
I agree with the article wait ATLEAST till there is talk of a relationship.... Geeze.... or forget it. for sure it is a one nite stand (though maybe repeated) and wont really be lasting. Feelings are fickle and at the least should be given a few meetings to be sure first.
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Wednesday 22 April
By Lisa
You never hear people say they regret NOT sleeping with somebody, but plenty of people do regret sleeping with just anybody. Sex should be special, instead people have the morals of alley cats. I personally do not see how people can just jump into the bed with somebody and not be worried about diseases. If somebody can immediately "connect" or have the "right chemistry" with you on the first or second date, you can be sure they found that same chemistry with somebody else before you...... and someboy else before that person...... and somebody else.....
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