It's the third (okay, okay, second) date, and he's invited you back for a "nightcap." The lights go down, you're settling into the couch and slipping off your cardigan, he heads to the stereo and puts on something to set the mood ... Hootie and the Blowfish?!Boom, your hormones come crashing back to earth.
Never underestimate the power of choosing the right soundtrack for your real-life love scene. After all, Barry White had a career for a reason.
A Sour Note
Of course, you and Loverboy may not see eye to eye. For him, hearing Thom Yorke's maudlin mewing may be Viagraesque; for you, it's a one-way ticket to Hand-Me-a-Noose-ville.
Case in point: I once dated a bartender who, one night after closing time, popped a fistful of quarters into the bar's jukebox and hit play on every Nine Inch Nails and Metallica song on offer. I had to beg him to unplug the machine so I could think straight.
Click here to read more horror stories -- and a killer playlist for any amorous occasion.
Another guy played a CD containing a dozen covers of "The Girl from Ipanema." On repeat.
Rachael from Indianapolis has a do-not-play list. "My boyfriend and I sometimes take turns picking a song from my music library and having a little slow-dance in the living room," she says. "One time, Josh chose The Black Crowes' 'She Talks to Angels.' Um, isn't that song about a crazy girl who pretends her parents are dead?! Needless to say, pouting ensued."
Choose a Winner
So what are some tried-and-true tunes guaranteed to turn up the heat? For me, it's Depeche Mode's "Songs of Faith and Devotion" (particularly "I Feel You") and Tricky -- sultry, edgy and without a whiff of sappiness.
R&B also seems to do the trick. Jana of Provo, Utah, says that she and her husband consider "Year of the Gentleman," by Ne-Yo, "baby-making music. I guess it worked -- we're preggo!"
"In college, my entire dorm floor knew not to knock on my door if they heard Janet Jackson's "Velvet Rope" playing," admits writer Brenda Della Casa.
Nicole from Atlanta gives a thumbs-up to singer Jill Scott ("She just oozes sexy!"), while Anne in Washington has rave reviews for "Like You'll Never See Me Again" by Alicia Keyes.
Suzanne from Colorado prefers something a little more yacht-rock: "Groovy Kind of Love" by Phil Collins. "The title is playful and a bit outdated," she says. "But the song says it all! This is my favorite snuggle song."
Your Professionally Chosen Playlist
"When you're sexing up someone, you really want to have something that is both powerful and sensual all at once, which is exactly what every make-out/sex-out should be," says DJ/writer Sarah Lewitinn of Ultragrrrl fame.
"Songs that have intense peaks and relaxing valleys are key in setting the pace and making sure that your tonsil hockey is varied and exciting. You also want the sort of playful and light songs like 'God Only Knows' to keep things light."
To help her readers whom she feared "were making out to really terrible emo bands that are fronted by boys with no balls and no idea how to sing about a woman," Sarah created a no-brainer make-out playlist. Her picks, worth downloading immediately:
Band of Horses: "The Funeral"
The Beach Boys: "God Only Knows"
Jeff Buckley: "Hallelujah"
Cocteau Twins: "Lorelei"
Decemberists: "We Both Go Down Together"
Duffy: "Rockferry"
Echo & The Bunnymen: "The Killing Moon"
Interpol: "Take You on a Cruise"
Glasvegas: "Geraldine"
Radiohead: "Bullet Proof ... I Wish I Was"
The Cure: "Close to Me"
Prepare to Skip
If your date suddenly freezes up when your favorite do-me go-to comes on, it may not be something you did wrong. Some songs may have unexpected and unwanted connotations -- his and his ex's "song," for instance. Don't over-analyze -- just skip the song and get back to business.
A co-worker of musician Jeff Gold failed to consider this when he brought home Gold's new CD.
"I have banned your CD from my house," the friend told Gold a few days later. His reason? "My wife listens to your CD over and over. The last straw was when she wanted to listen to it when we went to bed last night. The whole time, all I could see was you!"
Tell us! What songs get you all hot and bothered? And what tunes have totally ruined the mood for you?
Erin Donnelly is a frequent Lemondrop contributor.














Comments:
Add a comment
Friday 27 March
By Nanette
Actually I have a playlist on iTunes just for the very occasion(es) ;-) Many of them are just overall loungey...but they all work for me, a chick...
I call it my Sensual Mix (not very unique, but I'm all ears for better names)...
Anyway, here is my personal list (random order):
1. I'm Kissing You - Desree (This one really gets me in the mood quickly!)
2. Flightless Bird, American Mouth - Iron and Wine
3. Under The Milky Way - The Church
4. Wild - POE
5. They Say Vision - RES
6. Say It Right - Nelly Furtado
7. Clay Feet - Kristen Hersh
8. Beatrice - Daniel Lanois
9. Eyes On Fire - Blue Foundation
10. Volcano - Damien Rice
11. Here With Me - Dido
12. Take My Hand - Dido
13. Dance With You - Live
14. Shape of My Heart - Sting
15. Every Breath You Take - The Police
Reply
Wednesday 03 June
By K
Every breathe you take was a song written about "Big Brother" and spying. Google it, you will find that Sting was quite upset when people would say it was their "Love Song"
Oh can't you see, you BELONG to me....
Every step you take i'll be watching you...
Listen to the lyrics again, carefully...sorry for bursting your bubble
Friday 27 March
By goosehead0529
wow I wish I was as with it as Nanette -- I usually just put on John Legend (the Get Lifted or Evolver, not that second one).
Reply
Friday 03 April
By Megan
Nice mix Nanette! I guess I never thought about it much, but I usually use more accoustic background music when I'm getting it on. I prefer artists with chill sounds like Michael Buble, Feist, Iron & Wine, John Meyer, Jack Johnson, etc. I know the list is kind of long, but here are some of my favorites (stars are the tried and proved):
Unintended - Muse*
Leisure Suite - Feist*
Mushaboom - Feist
Love and Some Verses - Iron & Wine*
Each Coming Night - Iron & Wine*
Sunshine and Chocolate - Semisonic (kind of different and more upbeat)
Cuando Cuando Cuando - Michael Buble/Nelly Furtado (sexy duet)
Everything - Michael Bublè
One and Only - Teitur*
Falling In Love At a Coffee Shop - Landon Pigg*
Lucky - Jason Mraz/Colbie Caillat
I Will Love You - Fisher
Run - Snow Patrol*
This Land Is Mine - Dido (this song is kind of funny if you read the lyrics)
I Think We're Alone Now - Tiffany*
Somewhere Only We Know - Keane
Passenger Seat - Stephen Speaks
I Want You - Rachel Yamagata (kind of upbeat/jazzy)
Stolen - Dashboard Confessionals*
Collide - Howie Day
In For A Ride - Matt Lewis Band*
Beat of My Heart - Hayley Westenra
Let That Be Enough - Switchfoot
Only Hope - Switchfoot
If you want something different, try looking at lyric-less songs (like from movie soundtracks). One good one for kissing is: The Kiss - The Last of the Mohicans soundtrack
Also, one of my favorite artists is Loreena McKennitt. Her style is definitely unique, and if you're looking for different (like meditterreanian different) than check her out: The Mummer's Dance and Marco Polo are both good ones.
Hope this was helpful. If anyone knows some more "upbeat" songs, I'd like to add some to my collection :)
Reply
Friday 03 April
By Sarah
For lighthearted making-out just for funsies, I like sweet, cute, upbeat songs.
When you want it to have that meaningful poignancy to it, choose songs that make you feel like falling in love. Haha.
But when it's going to turn into something more serious... I think it's awesome to get it started with some amazing acid rock like Iron Butterfly or some trippy Jimi Hendrix. The Beatles are good, too, of course.
But really, it all depends on the occasion and on the individuals themselves.
Some examples.
Inaggadadavita -> Iron Butterfly
Little Wing -> Jimi Hendrix
Voodoo Child -> Jimi Hendrix
The Wind Cries Mary -> Jimi Hendrix
I Want You -> The Beatles
Hey Jude -> The Beatles
Dear Prudence -> The Beatles
While My Guitar Gently Weeps -> The Beatles
Blackbird -> The Beatles
Warmness on the Soul -> Avenged Sevenfold
Fix You -> Coldplay
In My Place -> Coldplay
Break On Through -> The Doors
Such Great Heights -> Iron and Wine
I'm Yours -> Jason Mraz
Life Is Wonderful -> Jason Mraz
Read My Mind -> The Killers
Everything Will Be Alright -> The Killers
Comptine d'un autre ete -> Yann Tiersen*
Shine -> The Morning Of
The Way It Is -> Nicole Atkins
Under the Milky Way -> Nicole Atkins (or The Church as Nanette said)
I could go on forever, but I'll resist.
I also agree with all of the songs formerly mentioned above. :) I'm downloading some of them now... hahaha. Thanks guys!
Reply
Tuesday 07 April
By Liz Mess
One song.
Why - Andrew bird
Reply
Thursday 18 June
By Mazz
here here!
Tuesday 28 April
By Roroyaboat
Musiq Soul Child
Anthony Hamilton
Robin Thicke
Any of these artist song can get things moving in the right direction(s)
Reply
Friday 15 May
By Chart
how bout "lost in space" by lighthouse..that one is cool.
Reply
Sunday 24 May
By natasha
dont listen to that type of music . my favorites are:
NICE & SLOW-USHER RAYMOND
LETS GET IT ON - MARVIN GAY
STILL- TAMIA
TRUST- KEISHA COLE
LOVE IN THIS CLUB -USHER RAYMOND
MEETING IN MY BEDROOM-SILK
STICK WITH U-THE PUSSY CATS DOLLS
PLEASE EXCUSE MY HANDS-PLIES
THEY DONT KNOW-JON B
Reply
Wednesday 10 June
By venussky09
the number one make out song is speechless by beyonce go to itunes, songfacts.com or youtube to hear it it will deffinelety turn you on
Reply
Saturday 11 July
By Daisy
1) Got you (Where I want you) - The Flys
2) Rain- Breaking Benjamin
3) The Scientist- Coldplay
4) More than Words-Extreme
5) I'll Be- Edwin McCain
6) Purple Rain- Prince
7) Love to love you baby- Donna Summer
8) Your Call-Second Serenade
9) Closer- Joshua Radin
10) Love Song- The Cure
Here's my list..they're pretty random =)
Reply
Thursday 16 July
By Stephanie
Barry White...no doubt! His song "Staying Power" is on point.
"tonight when we make love....I'm gonna work your body with my tongue..."
Damn, I'm turned on now!
Reply
Saturday 18 July
By Kashmir
I lost my virginity to Guns n' Roses "Appetite For Destruction". Hottest. Sex. Ever.
But for making out and getting to second base, "Sweet Child O' Mine" off that record is the best.
Reply
Tuesday 04 August
By Ed Zactly
I think you can discern the type of lover and love making style by their music selection (sensual vs frenetic, slow buildup vs quick release, stimulating the head vs. body, etc.)
Over the years, I've compiled 20 hours of playlists to customize for my lover's mood, character, and session suitability. These, mostly instrumental, go from smooth jazz with sax and rhythmic vibes (Club Jazz, Playground Love, Kirk Whalum) to Zero 7 and electronica (Quiet Storm: Alex Gopher, Blue Six, Delirium, Kaskade, Mo'Horizons, Tosca, Jaffa, Witness, Islands of Chill, and many others); mixes by Winter Chill, Cafe del Mar; vocals by Teddy Pendergrass, Luther Vandross, Sade; and the eastern kama sutra sounds of Al Gromer Khan.
Reply
Monday 10 August
By starrynight
I personally like Marc Broussard. He's from New Orleans, and his scratchy yet sex voice really puts you in the mood. I've yet to meet someone who didn't agree! He's a man who knows how to sing about a woman without getting sappy and all Michael Bolton-esque.
Meet Me in Love by Garth Brooks is another one (sexy, and not country)
Chasing Cars by Snow Patrol
Kissing You by Des'ree (good suggestion)
I fully agree that the wrong music can totally turn a make-out session bad, and I actually like music I'm not familiar with. If I'm singing along in my head, it totally takes me out of the moment.
Definitely check out Marc Broussard!
Reply
Saturday 15 August
By Rhonda
Want some good lovin' music? Try smooth jazz...Paul Hardcastle's Greatest Hits, Najee, George Howard, David Sanborn, Sade, George Benson...let your body Move to the Groove
Try it...you'll like it
Reply
Saturday 15 August
By Nadimu
Adore by Prince*
"When we be makin' love
I only hear the sound
of heavenly angels
cryin' above
tears of joy pourin' down on us."
*genius
Reply
Tuesday 18 August
By Tracey
There are plenty of fun and 'creative' ideas that couples can do in the 'bedroom' but as far as sharing that with you guys, this is my secret not to be 'shared' among millions who end up turning sensual and 'intimate' sex into nothing more but sleeziness!
Reply
Thursday 20 August
By Bill
Sorry, but I am one that does not like or want music while having sex. I want to be able to hear the person I am having sex with. A lot of good porn videos are ruined with stupid music blasting in the back ground.
Reply