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PDA between celebrity couples like Jessica Biel and Justin Timberlake are few and far between, we assume, to keep a hint of privacy in their otherwise public lives. But what happens when there's not enough PDA in our boring, pathetic, non-televised relationships?

Unlike our celebrity counterparts, I don't really need to shield my loved ones from the critical eye of the paparazzi. So that can't be the reason my boyfriend will sometimes make me practically walk 10 feet behind him every time we're out together

Nobody likes a "get a room" couple or a pair that baby-talks to one another within earshot of other human beings -- vomit! That's taking PDA too far. But while I don't expect my boyfriend to be over the top with the PDA, don't we all crave a little hand-holding and smooching now and then? Even in the most stable of relationships, these simple gestures to help affirm we are loved and adored by our significant others.

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The Flaws Make the Man

    Talks Funny
    Christian Bale--Everyone thinks Christian's hot for his body and cheekbones, right? Well, we think he's hot for his upper lip, which curls up ever-so-slightly when he speaks.

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    Talks Funny
    Tobey Maguire--Tobey talks out of the side of his mouth. That makes him seem sly and sultry, like he's got a dirty little secret that he's trying to share with us.

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    Short Stacks
    Mark Wahlberg--IMDB says Marky Mark is 5' 8-1/2", but we've heard from Boston bartenders that his shoulders can't clear a high top. That's okay -- being a wee bit short makes him look even more muscular.

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    Short Stacks
    Pharrell Williams--When you've got a sexy voice, a brilliant career AND you can play the drums, it kinda makes up for the fact that you only come up to our chins.

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    Short Stacks
    Elijah Wood--In real life, Elijah's a whopping 5'5". But in our fantasies, he will always be little Frodo Baggins of the Shire, hairy feet and all.

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    Oversized Features
    Adrien Brody--Oh, that nose pressed up against Halle Barry's cheek during their surprising Oscar night kiss. Since then, Adrien's nose has remained the embodiment of giddy, unabashed passion.

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    Oversized Features
    Jemaine Clement--His whole freaking face is huge, which always makes us wonder what kind of over-the-top sex expressions he's capable of producing.

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    Oversized Features
    Simon Baker--The owner of the most distracting eyebrows since Peter Gallagher, but we'd take them over the current crop over-landscaped Chace Crawford types any day.

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    Oversized Features
    Will Smith-- We remember an episode of "The Fresh Prince" where Carlton said of Will's ears, "You look like a car going down the street with both doors open." True, and yet only one of them is now a major movie star.

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    Scars
    Harrison Ford--The man who broke a thousand Wookiee hearts got his strapping chin scar when he tried to buckle his seatbelt. And there's nothing sexier than auto safety.

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So when the gestures don't come, a red flag pops up and we start to question our relationship. Is he embarrassed by me? Is there someone else? How hard is it to give me a freaking kiss over dinner? Should I enroll him in "Tool Academy"? Sure he could just be shy, but come on, who wouldn't want to show his love for a great girl like me?!

Tell us: Is your guy too anti-PDA or too cuddly in public? How do you get the level of touchy-feeliness you want?

Kristen Rollins blogs about sex and relationships for Lemondrop.


Animal Tongues!

    "Ack! Who ate my leftovers?"

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    You can grab the bull by the horns, but not by the tongue.

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    "Come on, just a taste."

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    "Ew. Morning breath. Must. Brush. Fangs."

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    "Hey y'all! Where's the *hiccup* party!?"

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    "Will someone please direct me to the nearest salt lick?"

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    Buddies!

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    "I drank too much last night."

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    "Yummy!"

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    "Stop scaring me like that!"

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