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In a recent post, I talked to booty experts Em and Lo about my frustration at having less sex the longer I was with my guy. While I was relieved to know that my sack-session-slowdown was normal, I still wondered what other people's lust lives were really like. So I asked friends ... How much sex is enough, and how much is too much?Here's what they had to say:
"Sex two to three times a week is more than enough for me, actually sometimes that's even too much. I've been with my boyfriend for three years and I guess we've just gotten used to each other. Most nights, we'd rather fall asleep then go through the motions of having sex." -- Rebecca, 28
"Wait, there's such a thing as too much sex?" -- Sarah, 26
"With work, graduate school and the stress of my everyday life, sex is the last thing on my mind, much to my boyfriend's dismay. So for me, once to twice a week, tops, is enough. That sounds bad doesn't it?" -- Lauren, 26
Click here to read more responses -- and add your own.
"The first year my guy and I were together was amazing. I'd say we had sex almost every time we saw each other. Obviously as time went on, our sex lives slowed down a little, but we still make sure to find time to keep that part of our relationship going strong. If the sexual chemistry isn't there anymore, what's the fun of being in a relationship?" -- Natalie, 23
"If someone's complaining about too much sex, maybe they're with the wrong person. As for enough sex, I'd say four times a week keeps me satisfied, although I'm always game for more!" -- Kara, 23
"I think the right amount of sex is different for everyone. Taking in factors outside of my relationship has a lot to do with the number of times I have sex each week, and each week happens to be different. Sometimes I really am tired, or I really don't feel well, contrary to popular excuses! But satisfying sex is part of every good relationship. I think I average about three times a week." -- Ashley, 27
"Ugh too much sex is when I just want to watch MTV reruns after working all day and my boyfriend is hounding me to get into bed with him. But I guess I'd say enough sex is two times a week, if I'm feeling generous." -- Sam, 26
So ... how much sex do you think is enough in a relationship?
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Saturday 14 March
By Melis
Sex is everything! I don't care if your tired or sick or both, Just do it lol! When you take the time to make love to your significant other your sharing a piece of yourselves with each other and that's needed to keep your love alive, besides you know what makes your partner tick quickies are awesome ;)
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Friday 13 March
By john M
I want sex Daily, My ex girl friend and I had morning sex and night sex EVERYDAY we were together, some times it would be a quick knock off, other times it would be a marathon of twisted bodies, and ankles locked around her ears. And anything was game. we even loved our toys, we bought lube buy the quart ,( I STARTED A CALENDAR TO PROVE HOW LITTLE I GET SEX) if things dont change soon she'll be the new EX, and for you women who claim you dont have time or too tired ,just to let you know I cook, clean,dust,laundry,shop,take care of packing our lunches, maintain the yard and the cars,boat, motorcycle and built my own house by my self, and I work for a living, so I dont want to hear I'm tired, that you guys don't help us around the house. and I am 50 years old
SEX is my tension release, helps you sleep, releases endorphines, creates closeness etc, etc, WITHHOLDING SEX CAUSES CHEATING , AFFAIRS AND DIVORCES.
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Friday 13 March
By john
want sex Daily, My ex girl friend and I had morning sex and night sex EVERYDAY we were together, some times it would be a quick knock off, other times it would be a marathon of twisted bodies, and ankles locked around her ears. And anything was game. we even loved our toys, we bought lube buy the quart , with my wife she thinks 1x every 6 day is enough( I STARTED A CALENDAR TO PROVE HOW LITTLE I GET SEX) if things dont change soon she'll be the new EX, and for you women who claim you dont have time or too tired ,just to let you know I cook, clean,dust,laundry,shop,take care of packing our lunches, maintain the yard and the cars,boat, motorcycle and built my own house by my self, and I work for a living, so I dont want to hear I'm tired, that you guys don't help us around the house. and I am 50 years old
SEX is my tension release, helps you sleep, releases endorphines, creates closeness etc, etc, WITHHOLDING SEX CAUSES CHEATING , AFFAIRS AND DIVORCES
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Friday 13 March
By Jim
speaking of sex, there can be too much sex or too llittle...but speaking of pleasure--there is only enough. It takes on a life of its own and when you've had enough, you will definitely know. So if the question of too much or too little is part of your relationship, ask yourself "Is it sex or pleasure?" then refer to the preceeding to aid you in your judgement.
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Friday 13 March
By D
Wow, most of your friends are in their twenties and are too tired or not interested. What will they be like when they get to be my age - 40 something and married to the same man for 18 years? We still enjoy "sex" 3 to 5 times a week, sometimes more!!!
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Saturday 14 March
By Devynn
it's different for every couple. but what ppl fail to get is that there is more to a relationship than just sex. there needs to be some mutal respect and understanding about what does and doesn't make your partner "tick" in and out of the bedroom. what needs, desieres and emotions do they have that aren't sexually related? what interests do they have outsde the home? even if you don't share them, do you care? there are many ways to show love. sex is the biggest one of all. but you head straight for the top, you'll miss all the good stuff in the middle. once it falls to the wayside, that top goal won't help you at all! case in point: i'm 5mons pregnant and since the beginning of my pregnancy, my libido has just slowed down. at this point, it's stopped. i don't even want to be touched. i'm sure alot of it is harmonal. but there's also the fact that my husband expects me to be his maid, mother and secretary while he sits on his ass. i'm a petite person, so all this extra weight i've stacked on (it's all baby and water, but i'm not used to carrying an extra 15lbs!) i'm pretty tired alot of time and a slow mover. i'd love to have a clean house, but the bigger i get, the harder it is to do. going to the grocery store is a trip that ends with a 2hr nap. if i ask for help, i get a brush off at best, or at worst, told that b/c he has a job, he can't do it. wtf? and i'm supposed to want to have sex with this man!? can you IMAGINE the resentment i'd have for him if i actually managed to do EVERYTHING AND have sex with him? luckily, he's in some serious training b/c he's about to deploy soon, so i don't have to see or deal with him and his attitude of entitlement. and my house stays cleaner b/c he's not around to trash it. if my libido comes back after the baby is born (and i think it will) i still don't know if i'll want to have sex with him. esp since i'm seeing how sex is only a blanket covering our real issues. fix the issues and your sex life will be better. if you don't, how often you have sex will be the least of your problems!
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Friday 25 September
By james
you are right, feelings count and determine the out come. You take care of yourself.
Friday 13 March
By Eden
Wow. Either I'm the minority here or most or these people don't have kids!
I'm 30 and my husband is 41. We have 5 children between the ages of 1 and 12. We also both work full time. When we first got together we had sex at least 2 times a day. Once the children came into our lives though, that decreased to 1 or 2 times a week. Now, 5 kids later(with our youngest still breastfeeding and sleeping in our bed) we do it maybe once a week(not IN the bed of course).
We are still very much in love and are very affectionate all throughout the day. Although we both agree that we would like to have more sex, sometimes by the time we're done with everything we need to do, we're so dead tired we just want to cuddle up and go to sleep for the few hours we can. We've discussed it quite a bit and both feel that even though we would like to have more, we don't NEED to in order to keep our relationship alive. We know we're still very attracted to each other because it's obvious through our actions.
We both had very full sex lives before we got together and kind of feel that we got the constant need for sex out before we had kids and can now focus on our family. I know once our baby gets a bit older and we have our bed back, we'll probably be back to at least once a day. The attraction and desire is definitely still there. I guess when you have as deep of a love as we do for each other, you don't need constant sex to validate it. I know in my heart we'll still be insanely attracted to each other 50 years from now.
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Friday 13 March
By Winston
My wife and I have been married for 12 years and together for 15. We have sex at least once a day and today we have done it 4 times and its not even 6 pm! We are just super attracated to each other and love the sex ; ) !!!! We suggest that you find someone you are really into and go for it!
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Saturday 14 March
By Jenyfer Rene
Well, I'm a military girlfriend, whose fiance is over 1000 miles away from her, so I'm also suggering from not enough sex, but whenever he is home, there is literately no such thing as too much sex. We probably do it three times a day on average when he is home.
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Saturday 14 March
By Kelli Eppinette
I'm 26 and I love sex. If I could have it 3 or 4 times a DAY EVERYDAY then maybe i would be satisfied. In my last relationship we started off everyday and then as time went on he went down to 3 or 4 times a week. that was not enough for me but i loved him so i dealt with it.
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Saturday 14 March
By jean
I don't think sex will ever go out of style, and at 74 ,I sure hope not.
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Saturday 14 March
By Tarrna
I lov to hve sex, my ex and I was like freaking rabbits. it was ike 6 to 8 times a day everyday. My current girl and I sex is like what is sex. She is so anti sex it is not even funny. when I even mention getting laid she rolls her eyes at me and says we did that the other day an the other day could have been like 4 months ago. To her sex is not important in a relationship at all infact nor is communication. What is it with some women? I mean comeon I am a woman as well and I just don't understnad them. I understand me but not any others. Ones I have been with are like rollercosters. I think their are two important factors ina relationship the first being communication and the other sex. Thats not all to a relationship but still u get my point.
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Sunday 15 March
By Aexone
I was in a relationship for a long time and getting sex was a chore.
All the fun was lost!
Then I moved on, I found this women from my past life who treats me like a god.
And sex is always great, sometimes five times a week and sometimes we skip three days and then make up for it.
I feel that the passion ,attraction and love for a person can keep the fire( sexual drive flowing) alive. And women if you are attracted and love your man and can achieve climax ,there should be no reason to stop enjoying it espacially while your are young and always beautiful. Men do whateever it takes to turn her on and sometimes don't do a thing just be a man.
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Sunday 15 March
By H Rufus
I am 58 an run an International Introduction service in the Ukraine. I enjoy sex with women in their 20's at leat 18 to 20 times a week and always look foward to it. Yes, I do take the blue pill and several other suppliments but my mind is alway in gear. Some people just enjoy it more than others. You are only as young as you feel.
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Sunday 15 March
By TOOMUCHSEX
My wife and I have been married for 18 months of the 3 1/2 years that we have been together. I'm still laughing at some of the comments regarding the question; "How Much is 'too much sex"......
When we first got together, we had sex at least TWICE a day. Now, it has tapered off to about once a day, most days.
By the way, my wife and I are both SIXTY YEARS OLD! (60) You figure it out.....; ).
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Sunday 15 March
By S
Hey folks, theres no such thing as to much, the average is 2 to 3 times a week, thats 96 and 144 times a year, some weeks more some less. And thats normal. I'm with the guys on this one for "HEALTH" reason, thats right. Sounds strange but it's a fact, the more sex a man has the less likely he'll develop prostrat problems ( which happens anyway with age) my Dr. says keep it empty,because the body will absorb the portein and thats not good for men.
I have sex with my wife once a month "IF" that, it's been like that for 15yrs, I have a friend, of 10yrs married w/ 2 kids, its 2 to 3 times a week. My wife and I are'nt active, my friend and I are very active. Are we attached at THE HIP, yes.
All I want is 2 things the 2 f's, feed me and _____thats it. you'll get anything U want from me, without a fuss thats my comfort level..Don't take things for granted that goes for both of U. Make things in your life fun and exciting as much as U can and enjoy......
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Sunday 15 March
By LoverGirl
Never TOO MUCH sex. If my man's body is laying next to me, if he is near enough to touch, I WANT that touch, I NEED that touch, I CRAVE that touch. I am very restrained when required, but very passionate when the opportunity presents itself! I love kissing, teasing, cuddling, ear-nibbling, and hand-holding. I love to trace my fingernail lightly along his neck, run fingers in his hair, blow warm kisses in his ears, and to massage him in hot oils- all over! I cannot imagine WHY any woman will not take advantage of the joy of her man's body next to her?? I love to kiss and love sex, but only in a relationship. Being apart for work, or for grocery shopping, only intensifies my passion for his contact and our eventual climax when we see each other again! We enjoy our bodies and our sexuality. After all, it was a gift from God, part of the original designer's equipment. During sex, my man climaxes once or twice, but I experience 5 or more climaxes if we continue. I am considerate and try to space them out several hours, to give him chance to rest in between. Otherwise, he accomodates me several times BEFORE he releases his "intensity". I am 62 years old, and I do NOT foresee changing in the future. Hey, what's wrong with these mid-30's gals? I work full time also! Maybe the key here is healthy bodies, healthy eating, and healthy attitudes???
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Sunday 15 March
By LoverGirl
P.S. on my last comment! We never "limit" our sexual encounters to 2 or 3 times weekly. I am available to make love EVERY NIGHT. My man loves this, and he wants me just as much. If you take care of your body, proper rest, the right nutrition, and a positive view of life..... every night is NOT too much. If you decline your own personal development in these areas, you have given up a very special gift early in your life time!
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Sunday 15 March
By IsIs
There is a thing as to much sex. But when you got two people who are open minded then you make time. There are time when it may be boring . Then you add something romantic. To it not just for him but for you too Make a date with your mate sex only last a short time, but hter is an art to learning to make love the feeling last longer but it takes two. If you let your sex life stay the same it get boring and its always the same.
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