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TOTALLY HAPPENING TOTALLY OVER IT
Bad Economy Doesn't Cause Bad Sex. Bucking the conventional wisdom that says There's no such thing as a free ride, a recent study by Consumer Reports shows that Americans are having just as much sex now as they were before the financial crisis. Now that's a stimulus package we can believe in!
 Bad Sex Causes Bad Economy. Finally, someone said it. Although we have to admit, a recession-era Sex and the City might actually be worth watching. We suggest starting with Mr. Big losing all of his money in the Madoff scandal and Carrie and the gang trying to get girl-drink drunk using food stamps.
A-Rod Reveals All. These days, startling televised revelations are nothing compared to the flurry of commentary that immediately follows them. It seems like everyone is weighing in on whether or not Yankee Alex Rodriguez's televised "my bad" was as sincere as it seemed. We say, "Screw that! How's this affecting Madge?!" Swimsuit Issue Reveals Some. Poor Swimsuit Issue. After the imploding economy, A-Rod and Michael Phelps, no one has time for bare midriffs and mile-long thighs. But chin up ... you still got to shake up a Middle East election. Doesn't that make you feel good?

M.I.A.'s Inflated Belly. We don't know why people were so shocked by M.I.A.'s delivery-date Grammy performance. Obstetricians have been saying for years that the best ways to induce pregnancy are to eat spicy foods, have sex or perform a live mash-up of your hit song with Jay-Z, Kanye West, Lil' Wayne and T.I. Nadya Suleman's Inflated PayPal Account (and Lips). We thought we were over being shocked and annoyed by this story last week. That was before we saw the octuplet mom's Dateline interview, before we visited her new donation page and before we started to wonder if she got the Jolie treatment at her local plastic surgeon's office. Can this story get trainwreckier? Yes, it can.