My entire life changed in 2008. I went from being single to being a Mrs. My husband and I bought our first house and our first dog. And I changed the course of my career when I left the rat race and decided to try my hand at freelance writing.

Change is scary, of course, but I had at least been anticipating most of it. My wedding date had been marked on my calendar for over a year, and I knew that it wouldn't be too long after we said, "I do" that my husband and I would move into a house and start a family with a four-legged companion.

However, I have no idea what 2009 will bring. My datebook is empty. I have no life-changing experiences for which to prepare. As of now, the new year is a blank slate, and that scares me more than change.

The only thing I can expect in 2009 is to watch my husband deploy again.

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It's been hard enough learning how to be a wife, let alone a military wife. Try as I might to be supportive, I can't shake the frustration that occurs when I think about my husband's occupation. He chose this life before he met me. Even if I could convince him to get a 9-to-5 job, he can't. He has made a commitment to the military, a commitment that sometimes seems stronger than the one he made to me when we said our vows.

I struggle with loneliness when he is away. I fight feelings of anger. I know that I need to be strong, to keep on living my life when he is gone, but most times it's easier said than done. While I survived his first deployment, his second one is proving to be just as challenging, if not more so. I try to remember the tricks I employed to get myself through the first one -- make plans with friends, travel, stay busy -- but I didn't consider that the brutal winter weather in Omaha would make those more difficult than before. Instead, I spend most nights feeling alone in my big house and resentful that he can't share the responsibility of walking the puppy when temperature drops below zero.

So what can I do to become a better military wife? I suppose I can just accept (and expect) the unexpected. Each day I can vow to do the best I can to just get through the next 24 hours. I can't change what my husband is doing, nor can I change how I feel about what he does, but I can work harder at being in control of my day and how I spend my time. Baby steps, baby steps.

I can also cut myself some slack. J.B. has had years to mentally prepare himself for his deployments; I haven't. If I didn't feel vulnerable or depressed or lonely when he was deployed, I think something would be wrong with me. I love my husband too much to just say, "Ciao!" when he leaves and be okay without him for two months.

What has helped make the challenges in my life more bearable has been writing about them here. Since September, when "The Starter Life" began, you have all been wonderful listeners. It's been a privilege for me to share my stories with you, and I truly appreciate all the support and advice you have given me. I hope that you will visit my personal blog, Somewhere in Middle America, to follow my ongoing adventures playing house in the heartland.

Until we cross paths again, I hope that 2009 meets all of your expectations and that you have a happy, healthy and prosperous year.