Lemondrop

You'd think that if a man turned his house into an intricate labyrinth of garbage tunnels, he would have either A. memorized said maze or B. made a map. Unfortunately, Gordon Stewart, 74, apparently failed to do either of these things. He got lost in the burrows and didn't make it out of his home alive.

Neighbors called the police when they hadn't seen Mr. Stewart leave his Broughton, England, house for several days. But before the cops could go in to search, they had to call in a specialized diving team, whose breathing apparatus would shield them from the powerful funk of at least 10 years' worth of accumulated riffraff fashioned into a human Habitrail. This was obviously a home in need of a feminine touch. Or a mop. Or a bulldozer.

While it's certainly an unusual demise, it's not the first of its kind. Accidents like these have been reported in other homes cluttered sky-high with junk. There's even a name for such domiciles: "Collyer's mansion." It memorializes the Collyers, two New York City brothers and compulsive hoarders who died in 1947 when they became imprisoned in their own garbage-filled, intricately booby-trapped trash-maze.

So if you see your ponytailed neighbor riding around on his bike all day long and constantly lugging armloads of cardboard boxes and garbage into his place, maybe you should have an intervention of some sort. The kind with gas masks and scoop shovels.