Last year, 22-year-old Taryn Davis lost her husband, Cpl. Michael W. Davis, in an IED bombing in Iraq. Not only was she heartbroken, but she was amazed by the lack of resources available for men and women who had lost their spouses in military conflicts. So she decided to help fill that void herself in the form of the American Widow Project, a documentary and nonprofit organization dedicated to helping the spouses of men and women killed in military conflicts through the grieving process.
The documentary, shown at film festivals around the country, is comprised of Taryn's taped visits with young widows around the country. "It was for me," she told the New York Times of making the film. "I was hoping I would learn a little about what my life would be like without Michael. I really just wanted to know that I wasn't alone."
The AWP Web site provides a 24-hour hotline for widows, staffed by men and women who have lost military spouses. It also provides networking assistance to help connect widows with local people willing to volunteer services like babysitting and counseling.
The Web site's resources range from information on planning a funeral to dealing with military protocol, but perhaps most uniquely, the site provides forums for spouses to share stories, advice, memories and photographs to help one another cope with their grief.
Click here to preview the "American Widow Project" documentary, available for sale on the organization's Web site.
Also on Lemondrop: See how people around the country and world honored Veterans Day.
Veterans Day
Florence Palko, standing next to her son Gary, pays tribute to her husband Walter Palko who is buried in Arlington National Cemetery on Veterans Day in Arlington, Virginia, November 11, 2008. Florence shares her birthday with the national holiday and took the day to remember her husband who was a veteran of the Korean and Vietnam wars. REUTERS/Mitch Dumke (UNITED STATES)
Reuters
A large sign showing the number of U.S. troops killed in the war in Iraq is shown on Veteran's Day in a field of 4,824 wooden crosses in Lafayette, California November 11, 2008. REUTERS/Robert Galbraith (UNITED STATES)
Reuters
Lorna Levante and her eight-year-old daughter, Kelsey, visit a memorial constructed of 4,824 wooden crosses, the number of U.S. troops killed in the war in Iraq, on Veteran's Day in Lafayette, California November 11, 2008. REUTERS/Robert Galbraith (UNITED STATES)
Reuters
CHICAGO - NOVEMBER 11: (AFP OUT) U.S. President-elect Barack Obama (L) and Gulf War veteran Tammy Duckworth both their heads after placing a wreath to honor America's veterans on Veterans Day at the Bronze Soldiers Memorial November 11, 2008 in Chicago, Illinois, The national holiday, held on the anniversary of the end of World War I, honors all those who have served their country in the military. (Photo by Tannen Maury-Pool/Getty Images)
Getty Images
CHICAGO - NOVEMBER 11: (AFP OUT) U.S. President-elect Barack Obama (L) and Gulf War veteran Tammy Duckworth honor America's veterans on Veterans Day at the Bronze Soldiers Memorial November 11, 2008 in Chicago, Illinois, The national holiday, held on the anniversary of the end of World War I, honors all those who have served their country in the military. (Photo by Tannen Maury-Pool/Getty Images)
Getty Images
President and First Lady Laura Bush wave as they returned to JFK airport in New York on Tuesday, Nov. 11, 2008, following Veteran's Day ceremonies aboard the Intrepid Air and Space Museum. (AP Photo/Rick Maiman)
AP
President and First Lady Laura Bush wave as they returned to JFK airport in New York on Tuesday, Nov. 11, 2008, following Veteran's Day ceremonies aboard the Intrepid Air and Space Museum. (AP Photo/Rick Maiman)
AP
Rudy Castore, a World War II veteran, waves from a military truck during the Veterans Day parade in New York, Tuesday, Nov. 11, 2008. (AP Photo/Seth Wenig)
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UNIONDALE, NY - NOVEMBER 11: The New York Islander players stand through a moment of silence to commemorate Veteran's Day prior to their game against the Philadelphia Flyers on November 11, 2008 at the Nassau Coliseum in Uniondale, New York. (Photo by Bruce Bennett/Getty Images)
Getty Images
Vietnam veterans with the organization Veteran's for Peace march wearing masks of President Bush, Vice President Cheney and Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice in the Veterans Day parade in Boston., Tuesday, Nov. 11, 2008.(AP Photo/Charles Krupa)
AP
Comments:
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Tuesday 11 November
By nancy
Bravo to you Taryn, USN(ret) thanks you.
Reply
Tuesday 11 November
By jameskdome
It's best to grieve alone and with God and keep moving.
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Tuesday 11 November
By calgal74
No James it is better to share and grow from the experience whether it is a loss through war, crime, or health issues. The only way to move on is through sharing and gathering strength from others who have experienced a similar loss. I applaud this woman for doing what she does and helping when the government failed the wives and families.
Tuesday 11 November
By jon
everyone grieves differently and no one should do it alone
those that do it alone only think they have gotten through it
but instead they are hiding emotions
Wednesday 12 November
By CWO4
James, have you ever observed a military widow being removed from base housing after her spouse was recently killed in combat. She and her family are removed from her circle of friends and support in a very traumatic way in a professional and cold scenario of events that she is the victim of.
Tuesday 11 November
By ron mckinney
god bless all the vetrans freedom is not free happy vetrans day
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Tuesday 11 November
By Anthony
Hi, with all due respect, is it possible to become penpals with Taryn? thx...
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Tuesday 11 November
By Al
Taryn, Bless your heart. I'm so sorry for your loss. Keep your mission strong. Your efforts will be felt by those in need. You are an angel.
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Wednesday 12 November
By Scott
James,
With all due respect. You do not know what your talking about. Grief over the death of a spouse or family member is the deepest hurt most normal loving people will ever experiance. It is right next to P.T.S.D. I would recommend you read several good books on Grief. I hope you never come home from work to find a loved one who has passed away. Sincerely, Scott
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Tuesday 11 November
By terri Old
I am not a 'war widow" but I am a widow I am 47 years old and lost my husband 9/23/07 it is heart wrenching every day- this young woman is showing the strength of a thousand men--she is by far a hero in my eyes there is a web site called 'widows wear stilettoes it is a fantastic arena to vent and to hear how other widows deal with this situation Keep God in your heart and thank him for your blessings every day!!!! its what got me through
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Tuesday 11 November
By Elin
Speaking as a young widow, I think what Taryn is doing is wonderful. When my husband died 3 years ago I had trouble finding local resources and support from people who TRULY understood what I was going through. In response I started a Young Widows and Widowers support group in CT through meetup.com, and I'd like to think it has helped. Sometimes the best way to heal is to reach out to others. It takes strength and courage to do that at such a young age. I know what a difficult struggle this is, and Taryn is making a difference to so many. Truly inspirational!
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Tuesday 11 November
By tom
i can't believe someone said it is best to grieve alone. it is never best to grieve alone. It is best to have people to grieve with to help you through it. I for one admire this woman for allowing her grief and pain to create something to help others through theirs.
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Tuesday 11 November
By lindee
When my son joined the army in 1998 I formed a website for military moms and others. I was overwhelmed by the response. It is beyond comprehension that our country asks so much of us, yet gives us little or no resources to follow through. Bless this brave young woman. You aren't alone.
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Tuesday 11 November
By Samantha
I think this is amazing. I'm Active duty, and it's touching to know that, should I get a husband, and should I than die, he'll have the ability to get support from something like this.
I'm happy (though sad) that those who have to suffer the lose of someone so close have the support available to them.
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Tuesday 11 November
By Z
Taryn - You are truly an Angel. And, so strong for such a young woman. God Bless you for helping other people. Stay strong, young Lady! You make middle aged Ladies like me proud and I don't even know you. Maybe someday I will. In the meantime, may God help you in dealing with your grief. And, THANK YOU to all the Veterans for our Freedom. "Freedom is not free"....
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Wednesday 12 November
By Theresa
I too am a widow from the war and there are many organizations out there that helped me. the best one was TAPS.... www.taps.org They are the most wonderful people and I am still in contact with them today. Just thought I would let you know there are people out there to help us....God bless and I wish you many blessings in the years to come.
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Wednesday 12 November
By Dana
Taryn - I commend you for taking such an amazing intiative during such a sad and painful time in your life. I am a military wife and I'm very lucky and so thankful to have my husband still with me and in a non-deployable position. I would like to pass along a resource - www.MilitaryOneSource.com, may be too little, too late for some, but there ARE resources for many things available through this and if I can help just one person by passing it along, then I am blessed. Again, thank you for your courage and also for your sacrifice, a military wife can be a thankless job.
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Wednesday 12 November
By Lt.'s Wife
DANA - my husband was also in a non-deployable position, but as the fine print says they can do whatever they want, he was pulled from his unit, retrained in a position he distains, and inserted into a unit from another state for mobilization. Consider yourself luckey, but not truely safe. If he has not already been deployed, he is a target, they are now looking through files for people who have not been over there yet. This is happening in AGR as well.
Tuesday 11 November
By Tea
I am a widow of the war and TAPS is available for the widows. They have been out there for many years! They are a wonderful group of people that help you in every aspect of the grief process. www.taps.org They helped me. God bless and many blessings in the future.
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Tuesday 11 November
By Monita
It is never best to grieve alone. I lost my oldest son nearly 4 years ago and I can assure you, being alone is one of the worst things you can do when you are grieving. Find a group, a friend, anyone to share your feelings with, but please share your feelings. My heart goes out to everyone who has lost a loved one, especially a child or a spouse. It is a pain that never goes away.
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