Lemondrop

No. Seriously. Somebody has invented deep-fried beer, y'all, and we couldn't be more thrilled. Unless they figured out a way to remove all the calories.

Unlike deep-fried maraschino cherry juice, there is absolutely nothing funny about this snack. For starters, it's made out of pretzel dough, so it's already won our heart. But it gets better! The finished product -- in which the beer retains its alcohol, in case you were wondering -- looks like ravioli, so we can feel kind of classy whilst getting completely trashed on fried pretzel booze. It's like somebody asked "What do people love?" and actually answered the question correctly (i.e., alcohol and carbs).

This precious manna was invented by Mark Zable, and will make its grand debut and at a deep-fried-food contest at the Texas State Fair. Finally, that excuse to go to Dallas we've been looking for presents itself: deep-fried pretzel dough with a beer-filled pocket on the inside!

Dear Readers,

The mercurial swamp creature who edits this column suggested last week that it was high time to use my beery-eyed personal failures to directly answer your questions about love and sex.

It might helpful to think of me reading said queries while bedecked in a turtleneck and scratching my distinguished James Lipton beard with a mug of Constant Comment. In truth? I'm wearing a tattered plaid robe I'm pretty sure my mom bought me at Old Navy, and I'm drinking beer.

Let the healing begin!

I'm 24 and finally had a one-night stand. I didn't bother leaving my number or any contact information (or even my name) in the morning for fear of coming off as clingy or naïve. But I accidentally left a couple of accessories at his place, and now I have no way to get in touch. Should I have just offered him my cell number and left it at that? Do I just cope with the fact that the guy and these items are lost forever? -- MC

A lot of stuff going on here, MC. First, I'm confused about you not giving him your name, and how doing so would be clingy or naïve. I mean, unless you met at one of those "Eyes Wide Shut" masquerade balls. Name-giving is sort of standard -- it's actually weirder NOT to know it. Sounds like you were a little discombobulated and took off. Also, unless you left family heirlooms, your accessories are likely already in the garbage or dumped helplessly into a drawer, for some future girlfriend of this guy to ultimately find and berate him for. So yeah, say goodbye, because they're gone. In the future, make sure you have everything before you jet, and maybe leave your name. Or at least an email address.

So ... turns out that an owl's natural state is, apparently, quite hung-over-looking. How do we know this? New Tumblr Hungover Owls documents it in photos. Check out more of our fave funny owls after the jump.

Four must-have accessories for fall and how to wear them. (CollegeFashion)

Six emerging designers to watch out for at New York Fashion Week. (Refinery29)

Tips about budgets, calendars and work-life balance: 10 secrets of successful, hot chicks. (TresSugar)
10 ways to have better sex -- according to science. (Esquire)
Does his wardrobe make you cringe? Try these seven ways to transform his style. (YourTango)
How to start running: Five tips for beginners trying to get your feet off the ground. (Health)

There's plenty of entertaining stuff on the Internet, but true innovation is very rare. It just seems like everything is so similar to -- or inspired by -- everything else.

But then something comes along like the new video for Arcade Fire's "We Used to Wait," a song from their recently released album "The Suburbs." It's amazing. Like, mind-blowing, tell-all-your-friends, post-to-Twitter, email-your-mother amazing.

The interactive film, as it's being called, takes you down memory lane in a hip, Arcade Fire sort of way. Remember when they did the trailer for "Where the Wild Things Are," and you kind of got the chills and were all excited to see the movie, but then it turned out to really suck? Well, this is just like that, only it's awesome.

You enter your childhood address at The Wilderness Downtown (the name was taken from lyrics in the song), and the website, which is one of the first sites on the Web using the new HTML5 standard, creates a custom video mashing-up Google Street View images from your old stomping grounds with the video's original footage.

Throughout the song, different-size windows pop-up over your screen -- kind of like fireworks, as Flavorwire said -- and the video's hero, a kid wearing a hoodie, seems to be exploring your own hometown. At one point, which coincides with lyrics in the song, you write a letter to your childhood self. It sounds all corny and nostalgic, but considering that's kind of the theme of the song (and the whole album, really), it works.

Parties! So awesome, right? Right! Except, of course, when they're stupid. And while 2010 has been an awesome year for many things -- salmonella, bedbugs, unemployed teenagers -- it hasn't been a great year for theme parties.

Really, you ask? Really, we answer below. Even though it's only September, last year's ugly sweater party has some serious competition. First we heard about the new "sex party" for expecting parents. Then we rounded out the list. Check out our picks for eight of the stupidest parties of 2010.

Even in London -- the city that birthed waif-y Kate -- curves are suddenly in.

It seems Christina Hendricks -- and her "Mad Men" character, Joan -- has become the new body ideal. According to the London Telegraph, Louise Court, editor of [British] Cosmo, said, "This year loads of girls want to look like Christina Hendricks, not Kate Moss."

Personally, we don't find this to be news. We'd rather fill out a skirt and eat a healthy lunch any day than say something as absurd as "Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels," like Ms. I-Invented-Heroin-Chic herself.

It's also a little odd that body types, as well as hemlines, are expected to change with the wind. Last we looked, you were born more or less the shape you were born, no? Unless Cosmo has a wild new sex tip that can make an apple morph into a pear.

But tell us, who's your body role model today?

Dear Stayfree,

Never mind that guys who express that much interest in maxi pads make us think PERVY FETISHIST. Using a "sensitive" shirtless dude to sell women maxi pads is egregiously condescending and skin-crawlingly gross.

It is nowhere near as cool as the Old Spice guy. In fact, we can't think of anything LESS appealing than a patronizing dude demonstrating the absorbency of your maxi pads.

Hello, what is he doing with MAXI PADS IN HIS HOUSE? Why is he so invested in what maxi pad we choose to use WHILE HE'S COOKING US DINNER? And why would we want a MAN to teach us about MAXI PADS in the first place?!

Creepy and pathetic, Stayfree. Enjoy!