Lemondrop

Ask for an Irish Car Bomb at some bars this St. Patrick's Day and you might get turned away. The combination of Irish stout, Irish Cream liqueur and Irish whiskey (usually Guinness, Bailey's and Jameson) is considered offensive because of its name, which comes from the weapon the Irish Republican Army (IRA) regularly deployed in its battles, once exploding 22 cars in Belfast in one day. If that makes you uncomfortable, we suggest swigging Bushmill's instead.

At some point in your life, you've probably liked someone you shouldn't.

Someone married, someone engaged, someone dating a close friend.

You try very hard to feel different, but the harder you try, the less you can. It doesn't matter whether they like you back, or flirt with you, or do nothing at all. Taboo interest of this stripe has a sordid momentum all its own, reciprocated or not.

I know, because it's happened to me. I've found myself unable to stop thinking about someone who was with someone else. And without anywhere to put these feelings I had, the emotion fed on itself until I found I was unable to be around her. Liking someone you're not supposed to like is deliciously poisonous, but soon the hemlock emotions can kill you from the inside.

From a purely fantastical standpoint, thinking about being with somebody else's significant other is sexy. It's so illicit! It's so taboo! The Bible's so against it! Ultimately, however, unless you're willing to break up a marriage (or at least try), end a friendship, change the way everyone you know thinks about you, unless you're truly, impossibly in love with this person (it helps if they're secretly in love with you, too), you need to stop. You need to pull yourself out of this sickening orbit of longing and lies.

Here's how.

Fun recipes in celebration of St. Patty's Day: green velvet cake balls, potato pancakes and more. (TheKitchn)

Conquer your fears of doing everyday things solo: 5 things every girl should do alone at least once. (Jezebel)

You've heard all the Match-OkCupid-eHarmony horror stories: The 10 worst online dating archetypes. (HeartlessDoll)

Partying on a budget today? Keep costs down with these fun St. Patrick's Day party craft and food ideas. (TheBudgetBabe)
This spring, the must-have essentials that Rachel Zoe can't live without. (FabSugar)
Rumors of the Lady Gaga video ban are false: Check out the racy "Telephone" vid, which debuted on MTV Friday. (Smitten)

While most of us are dying to shed our midsections, this 42-year-old woman from New Jersey has made it her goal to weigh 1,000 lbs. (CollegeCandy)
All images from linked blogs.

It's St. Patrick's Day, which means that rivers of vomit and green beer will flow through many a city this evening.

But what if your drinking makes it seem like just about every night is March 17? There's always Alcoholics Anonymous, but, it turns out, there's also a new alternative if you're not ready to go nuclear and abstain from drinking forever.

As the Denver Post notes, there are some people who fall into the category of "problem drinkers," meaning they drink more than they're comfortable with and don't even know it. How do you know if you're an undiagnosed problem drinker? It may be as simple as discovering your happy hour glass of wine routinely becomes half a bottle. Or that often you don't remember what came after happy hour at all.

Moderation Management aims to help problem drinkers with these types of problems get back to more reasonable imbibing habits. By the way, in case you're wondering if you need to teetotal, the organization defines "drinking at harmful levels" as more than three drinks on any given day and more than nine drinks per week for women ... and more than four drinks on any day and more than 14 drinks per week for men. Gulp.

This year, instead of kissing a frog who turned into a prince, the latest Disney princess actually turned into an amphibian. (In case you missed it, "The Princess and the Frog" comes out on DVD this week.) And, for the past two decades, owning a pet frog means I've endured every joke there is about the girl who kissed one.

For the record, my frog is named Maurice, and, against all odds, he just celebrated his 21st birthday, so he's legal. He even has his own Facebook fan page. He's definitely "single." And there are plenty of my friends following his every move. But if he were to turn into my prince, he'd still be a little young for me. He was born a tadpole the week I turned 9.

Some world records are downright terrifying -- world's longest fingernails, or the world's largest omelet (food poisoning, hello!) -- but He Pingping always held a warm place in our heart as the world's smallest man. Pingping was born with primordial dwarfism, a condition which resulted in his growing only 29 inches high. On Saturday, at the age of 21, he died of heart complications, taking the mischievous twinkle in his eye with him forever. A replacement record holder has yet to be found, probably because he's so small. (Telegraph)

Bret Michaels says that there is "no weirdness" about his new song with Miley Cyrus, which contains the lyric, "We slowly get undressed, we both know better than this," because Bret Michaels' actual sexual encounters begin with "I wipe the vomit away ..." (via PopEater)

Ever wondered how your favorite celebrities looked in high school? One word: AWESOME. (via Guanabee)

The always-elegant Katie Price has taken time from her busy schedule of doing God knows what to pursue a new passion: edible baby makeup. (via Holy Moly!)
"It's Always Sunny" stars Rob McElhenney and Kaitlin Olson are expecting one f**king funny baby. (via StarPulse)
Motormouth: Gwen Stefani
"I wanted so badly to have a backup plan for when I'm not performing anymore. Let's be realistic: It's not going to be like this forever." (via PEOPLE)

(Images: WireImage, FX, Getty)

According to old Celtic legend, there's a place where seal-people roam the Earth, shamrocks grow wild, and awesome videos on the Internet never, ever grow old.

Anyhow, it's St. Patrick's Day, and despite the fact that almost 37 million Americans are of Irish descent, some of them continue to think being Irish makes them uniquely kissable.

So here's a video that's near and dear to our hearts and relevant to the calendar date. It concerns a leprechaun on the loose in Alabama, and perhaps the greatest example of citizen journalism ever committed to college-ruled paper with a number two pencil. Despite their enthusiasm, he has yet to be apprehended. Enjoy!