Lemondrop

Randy Bresnik, 42, will not be around for the birth of his daughter. But at least he has a good excuse -- he's in space.

Bresnik is on the space team currently at the International Space Station, where he is hauling cargo from the ship to the station. His wife Rebecca is set to give birth to their second child today.

Luckily, ol' NASA has been kind enough to allow Bresnik to call and check in periodically on his wife. "I think like most parents, I would prefer to be there for the birth," Bresnik said in an interview with the space agency. "But you know, we don't pick this timing and so it's to be a bit disappointing not to see her in person right when she enters the world."

This little girl is actually a miracle, as ABC reports that the Bresnik's didn't think Rebecca could even get pregnant. They found out they were wrong right after adopting son Wyatt last year. "We're fortunate enough to witness the miracle of adoption as well as the miracle of child birth all in one year," Bresnik said. "We're just amazingly blessed."

I spend way too much time on Twitter. And when I'm not converting my every thought, dream, hope and love for peanut butter into 140 characters, I'm usually focused on dating, sex and relationships -- either helping other people sort their situations out or analyzing my own.

Tweet Nothings will be the conglomeration of these two seemingly disparate worlds as I select one tweet each week to glean something new about love, sex or wherever the two meet.

I'm somewhat new to following @moxieinthecity, whose raison d'être is almost too exhausting to even contemplate: she seems to be a one-woman enterprise devoted to giving dating advice, hosting non-judgmental social events and organizing sex ed classes, and that's not even taking into consideration the time she spends trolling dating Web sites so that the rest of our worst suspicions can be confirmed.

The guy she brought our attention to, you see, not only posted a photo of himself lounging on a bed sans top but also explained that his trouble wasn't meeting women (translation: he's super-cool), but finding the ones who have "substance" (translation: we're dumb).

Gamer girls can stand behind this: 10 things guys should never say to a girl who can kick their butts in "Metal Gear Solid 4." (Asylum)

Before the pants-free alien-esque music videos, she was Stefani Germanotta, NYU student: Check out Lady Gaga's riveting performance from 2005. (The Frisky)

Dating a married man? When feeling guilt, eat your feelings: Try this tongue-in-cheek recipe for sky-high banana cream "regret pie." (YourTango)
Because "vajayjay" was getting old. From "hot pocket" to "bearded clam," 10 awesome (or awesomely questionable) pet names for your lady parts. (Heartless Doll)
What the heck is a "ferrule"? Learn the anatomy of a makeup brush how to optimize its longevity. (BellaSugar)
Wax on or wax off? It's time to toss the Q-tips -- find out why cleaning your ears out can actually be dangerous. (Divine Caroline)
All Images from Linked Blogs

Thanksgiving is a time to be grateful for your loved ones -- or the fact that you only have to see them a few times a year. Here are some holiday tales of happiness and horror from celebrities and bloggers.

Pink's drunken pyrotechnics at Thanksgiving 2007
"We decided between six of us to drink three bottles of Patron before 11 a.m., and when somebody was saying grace, I decided that the sweet potatoes should be on my father-in-law's head, so I dumped the bowl on his head...And then I set my bedroom on fire because we [Pink and ex-husband Carey Hart] went upstairs to have a quickie and I left a cigarette in the oven mitt." (Celebitchy)

The Turkey Day that turned Sarah Silverman on to tofu
"When I was 9 or 10 years old, my dad took me over to a neighboring farm to help get stuff for the meal. The farmer, Vic, told me to look at all the turkeys and pick one out. I saw a cute one with a silly walk and cried, 'Him!' Before my pointing finger had even dropped to my side, Vic had grabbed the turkey by the neck and slit its throat. Blood and feathers went flying. I had sentenced that turkey to death! Up until then, I didn't know where meat came from -- and I've been a vegetarian ever since." (Marie Claire)

Tim McGraw trims the turkey, but doesn't clean the counter
The country crooner claims his favorite part of Thanksgiving is "me totally messing up the kitchen, and Faith pretending she doesn't even care -- but later cleaning it up when I'm not looking. I'm a good cook, but a sloppy one." (Good Housekeeping)

Demi and Bruce call a truce for Thanksgiving 2008
"We had an unconventional Thanksgiving, and we will all be together for Christmas as well with our three daughters," Moore said. "I think the key with any past is that you recognize and hold on to what you loved and what you gained, and you don't attach yourself to what you've lost." (Popeater)

Kristen Stewart. Like the stock market, how to hang a "floating" shelf and chalupas, her popularity is something we'll never understand. We don't see the appeal of Kristin Stewart the Actress, of Kristin Stewart the Sex Symbol or Kristin Stewart the Stoner. Today, "The Twilight Saga: New Moon" will be unleashed on the world, with more of Kristen Stewart's terrible facial expressions, hangy eye-bags and wooden acting -- proving, once again, that Kristen Stewart is the worst.

Kristen Stewart Is a Horrible Actress
Did you see "Twilight?" Because I sat through half of it before giving up, and I can honestly say that this Shaker chair (left) is a far more skilled actor than Kristen Stewart. As Bella, Stewart is a blank-faced dish towel, a hollow chasm bereft of emotion. Rather than channel any feeling through her characters, she resorts to annoying facial tics -- like chewing on her lip and blinking a zillion times.


And the Internet agrees with me. See?

Van Der Breakup
"Dawson's Creek" star James Van Der Beek has filed for divorce from his wife of six years, citing "irreconcilable differences." Maybe now Pacey will date her? (via TMZ)

Will Ferrell: Most Overpaid Actor
According to Forbes, Will Ferrell is the most overpaid actor in Hollywood. They determined this by calculating the return in investment for every dollar spent on his salary. In Will's case, it was $3.29. (via Perez Hilton)
"Bell" Reunion Not Happening
Mark-Paul Gosselaar crushed our hopes of a "Saved by the Bell" reunion when he told reporters that he thinks it's "dead." He added, "No one has come up with a good plan." (via In Case You Didn't Know)
Cage Fight
Nicolas Cage's manager, whom he's suing, claims that he advised the star that it probably wasn't the best idea to go out and buy up a ton of castles. In order to maintain his lifestyle, Nic would have needed to net $30 million a year. (via Page Six)
Bye, Bye, Oprah
Oprah Winfrey will announce on her show today that the 25th season of her daily chat fest will be the last. The show will stop airing in 2011. A run for president in 2012? (via Popeater)
Motormouth: Robert Downey Jr.
"I have no set plans for my future. I've never had it this good -- this is my day in the sun -- and I certainly don't want to look a gift horse in the molars." -- Robert Downey Jr., on his career plans. (via I'm Not Obsessed)

"Leggo my Eggo. Seriously. Let go of it or I will destroy you." This is the scene we're expecting at grocery stores throughout the country, which will be experiencing a crippling Eggo waffle shortage until at least the middle of next year.

Busy moms, college kids, and people who don't know how to cook are freaking out at the prospect that they might have to switch to instant oatmeal or (*shudder*) that weird healthy-looking brand of frozen waffles they've always scoffed at while Kellogg's desperately tries to crank out Eggos at maximum speed to meet the demand.

Heavy rains shut down Kellogg's Atlanta plant for a while in September, coupled with repairs on several production lines in a plant in Tennessee have left an empty, gaping hole in the freezer section where our beloved breakfast food used to be.

As much as this shortage might pain you, don't despair. We're here to help with a waffle recipe to tide you over ... that is if you can handle a breakfast without niacinamide and soy lecithin.

The holidays are all about spending time and spreading cheer with your family and loved ones. But sadly you can't pick your family, and awkward moments and off-the-wall comments are almost expected from at least one relative. (You have seen Christmas movies before, right?)

Don't fret -- no matter how shocking something (or someone) seems at the time, it'll be a good memory for holidays to come.

Just ask the following hostesses, who've seen and heard it all.

Please do not touch
"My cousin is a nurse, and he's not quite all there. When he started to give my sister's very shy boyfriend an impromptu 'healing massage' at the dinner table, we were all very amused. Thankfully the guy handled it well, and he and my sister are going to get married. We hope." -- Julie, 26

From the mouths of aunts
"Last Thanksgiving I had dinner with my boyfriend's family. During dessert, I had asked for a very small piece of chocolate cake, and I got passed a freaking gigantic slice. Just then, my boyfriend's aunt looked at me and said, 'Oh, you must be an alcoholic.' Everybody turned and stared, and nobody noticed when she corrected herself and said 'Oops, I meant chocoholic.'" -- Em, 24

For rent: holiday date
"My uncle brought a very young, very attractive woman to Thanksgiving. We spent the rest of the evening trying to decide if he had found her in the Yellow Pages." -- Chris, 31